Touch
by Co-Quill-Eon
Summary: His heart is beating wildly in his chest. He's never done this; kissing just to kiss. Kissing just to get closer to the person, because just being this close to them makes one feel like they're being consumed by the most wonderful heat. *Followup to Out
1. 1

Tyler hates coming to the Gilbert's now.

Well, hate is too strong a word, he thinks as he rings the doorbell and waits for someone to answer. He hopes that it's Jere who opens the door, but he hasn't answered Tyler's text about him waiting right outside the door, and he doesn't feel like waiting on the porch anymore like a creep.

Dislike. That's not the word either. Tyler _does _like coming to the Gilbert residence. After last week's fiasco at dinner, thanks to Damon fucking Salvatore, everything is out in the open, and it's the only place he feels like he can truly be himself if he chooses to. Not that he's going to start spilling his innermost feelings in the living room or anything like that, but if he feels like placing his hand on Jeremy's lower back, or kissing him goodbye, no one here will look at him oddly, or judge him. No, being inside the Gilbert residence is great, but getting inside is a totally different story.

At that moment the door swings open and the reason for his initial discomfort (or one of the reasons anyway) is standing there.

"Hey, Tyler." Elena says. She hasn't given either of them a hard time about their relationship, and doesn't ask too many questions (which Tyler is very grateful for, because he honestly doesn't know if he could answer what she wants to know. He and Jeremy _still_ aren't exactly sure about what's going on between them) but she _looks _at him.

Tyler's favorite feature on Jeremy, besides his broad shoulders (and Tyler would never have thought that sentence would ever be formed out _or _inside his head), are his eyes. They're so expressive - they can convey so many questions, and so many answers.

He and Elena have the same eyes, and hers always convey the same messages when she answers the door to see Tyler standing there; wariness, which is to be expected. It's not everyday your little brother starts dating his sworn enemy. But there is also so much expectation. She wants her brother to be happy, and right now _Tyler _is the one who has that ability. The pressure is definitely on. There's some approval, and that's good, but Tyler isn't sure what exactly she's approving of, and there's also that sense of confusion; that question that hasn't really been answered yet: 'How did this even happen?' and Tyler can't answer that question. He really wants to, not only for Elena's sake, but for his own, and he wants to work it all out first before he tries to tell anyone else. How can he explain that recently his need to attack Jeremy has changed into wanting to touch him gently? How does he explain the pull he has towards him, that gets stronger and stronger everyday? He can't, so he isn't going to. At least not yet.

"Hey Elena. Is Jere..."

"He's upstairs." She steps aside to let him in. Looking to his left he sees Stefan sitting on the couch, and they nod to each other before Tyler makes his way up the stairs.

Jeremy isn't in his room when he walks in, so Tyler flops on his bed and closes his eyes to wait. He always laments the fact that Jeremy isn't into football. Not just because those strong shoulders could do some serious damage on the field, but because he never has any sports magazines laying around.

But Tyler figures its better not to have Jere out there on the field with him, or better yet, the locker room. Things could get out of hand, and quickly.

His eyes open when he hears the bedroom door shut. Jeremy is standing there in jeans, and a T-shirt, his hair still damp from the shower Tyler is assuming he just stepped out of. The towel in the boy's hand confirms his guess.

His desire spikes as he looks Jeremy up and down slowly. See, _this_ is what drives him crazy. The sudden influx of these feelings and emotions that he's never felt for another guy before, let alone Jeremy Gilbert, but here he is, on the boy's bed, checking him out.

"Hey," Jeremy pads over to Tyler, his mouth curved up slightly to one side in a smile. "I didn't know you were coming over." He leans over and the clean smell combined with a scent that's just so _Jeremy _overwhelms Tyler momentarily. Lips still curved in that soft smile, Jeremy presses his mouth gently to Tyler's and lingers. They've just started doing this, kissing hello. It's still strange to Tyler, but in the best way possible. It makes his head spin and his heart ache in his chest.

They keep their lips together, moving them slowly against each other, but not delving into anything more aggressive, for a bit longer, before Jeremy backs off. Tyler waits for Jeremy's back to be turned before he licks his lips. "Why didn't you answer my text?"

"Shower." Jeremy throws his towel casually onto his desk and starts rummaging in one of the drawers for something.

Tyler watches Jeremy move; he loves the way his muscles flex under his skin, the way he fills out his shirt, the way his pants hang perfectly on his hips. Tyler can't help admiring Jeremy's ass, he loves it. The way it looks, the way it feels in his hands, the way it clenches around him when Tyler-

"Why?" Jeremy has found what he's looking for, a pencil, and has straightened up. Tyler doesn't know if the boy has noticed where his thoughts were going or the result of said thoughts, but he adjusts himself subtly anyway.

"What?"

"Why did you text?"

"Oh,"he watches Jeremy carry his book bag over to the bed, drop it over one side, and sit facing Tyler. "I just wanted you to answer the door. You know I hate when Elena does." Jeremy scoffs. "What, it's true. She looks at me with those eyes."

"What is she supposed to look at you with?" Jeremy says laughing slightly. "Her feet?"

"You know what I mean," he nudges Jeremy's hip with his foot. "She gives me that _look_."

Jeremy, who has retrieved a book from his bag, sets it aside and moves up the bed so that he's sitting next to Tyler while still facing him. "She doesn't have a problem with it, you know," he says in a low voice. "You and me. She meant it; she really is happy for me. For... us." He seems hesitant to use the word.

Tyler shrugs. "I know, but still."

Jeremy grins as he leans forward and presses his lips against Tyler's. "At least it wasn't Jenna," he whispers.

A brief pained expression flits across Tyler's face. "That's true. She always... _smiles _at me. _That _smile, you know which one I mean."

Jeremy laughs softly. "You're cute when you pout." He licks the seam of Tyler's lips and a shiver runs up his spine. God, this boy drives him insane.

Tyler pulls back slightly. "I don't pout," he says, but a small smile is playing on his own lips. Jeremy hums in a placating way, before leaning forward again, and this time Tyler parts his lips to grant him immediate access.

He loves the way Jeremy tastes, like fresh water. He marvels at how a mouth can taste like this. He feels Jeremy's tentative touch on his arm. Even though they've had sex before, _a lot, _these little things, these touches, innocent caresses that won't lead to anything, are still new to them.

Jeremy's fingers trail up Tyler's inner arm and the thumb traces the crease of his elbow. Another shiver runs down Tyler's spine, and his own fingers moves to rub the inside of Jeremy's wrist on the hand that is planted on the bed.

A small tremor passes through Jeremy's body, and he lets out a tiny puff of air against Tyler's lips.

Tyler moves his hand up Jeremy's soft skin, _so soft, _and dips slides briefly under the sleeve of his T-shirt, before moving over those broad shoulders to play with the soft, damp hairs on the nape of his neck. Jeremy leans into him, moving to sit closer so that their chests are nearly touching.

Jeremy moves the hand that was planted on the bed and places it on Tyler's stomach. Warmth diffuses through Tyler's body and he cups the back of Jeremy's neck, tugging him forward gently.

His heart is beating wildly in his chest. He's never done this; kissing just to kiss. Kissing just to get closer to the person, because just being this close to them makes one feel like they're being consumed by the most wonderful heat. He's kissed girls just so that he could forget; forget how he was failing his father at every turn, forget that he wasn't good enough and never would be, forget about the confusing spikes of anger he gets for no reason.

He's never kissed to remember - kissing so that he can memorize the taste and feel of Jeremy's mouth when he isn't around. Kissing so he can remember this feeling when he's in an awful mood and needs something good to hang on to.

Jeremy's chest is flush against his now, and the hand on his stomach is clutching at the fabric of his shirt, and Tyler's own hand has slid down to the base of Jeremy's spine, and the kissing is still slow, but it's steadily grown in passion and intensity, and Tyler squeezes his eyes shut even more, and he can hardly breathe, and Jeremy's breaths are quicker; Tyler can feel his chest against his own, rising and falling and Jeremy lets out another small noise, a whimper, and a light bursts behind Tyler's eyes, and he crushes Jeremy to his body. _So good, so fucking perfect-_

"Jere." There is a knock at the door and both boys start. They don't move away from each other right away, though. Their blown, dazed eyes meet each others, and they are both still panting slightly. "Jeremy? Tyler? I'm coming in." There is a mutter that sounds suspiciously like 'please don't be naked.' They tear their eyes away from each other now, and move away.

Elena turns the doorknob and steps in slightly. 'Sorry to interrupt." Neither one bothers to correct her. They know how they look; heavy breathing, flushed cheeks, rumpled clothes and hair, slightly unfocused eyes.

"Then why are you?" Jeremy asks, and Tyler is impressed at the steadiness of his voice.

Elena rolls her eyes at her brother's cheek. "_Because _Jenna said 'door open'. You know the rules."

"Since when?" Jeremy sounds indignant. Elena shrugs.

"I don't make the rules, I just deliver em"

"It never mattered before."

"Yeah well," Elena smirks, "_that_ was _before_ we knew you were bringing your boyfriend up here and not just a friend. If I have to keep my door open when Stefan is here, then so do you." She smiles teasingly. They both know this isn't a fair argument, seeing as how her boyfriend can move lightening fast and has super hearing, but Jeremy can't bring that up in front of Tyler.

Jeremy tosses a pillow in her direction instead, but she dodges it and laughs. "Door. Open." she calls out as she makes her way down the hallway and back downstairs.

Jeremy sighs and Tyler can't help but smile at him. "Sorry about that," Jeremy says as he scoots back down the bed and picks up the book he'd put aside earlier.

"No problem. You _are_ still a little kid."

Jeremy rolls his eyes, and knocks his bare foot into Tyler's ribs, but he's smiling anyway. The mood is broken, but the after effects of this kiss still lingers, their bodies still buzzing. They fall into a comfortable silence, where Jeremy reads his textbook, and Tyler just watches, feeling utterly content.

He settles down into the pillows after a while, and a moment later he feels Jeremy's hand come to rest on his leg.


	2. 2

**A/N: I just wanted to thank all of you for your wonderful reviews. And also a thanks to all of you that have favorited my 'series' (which is still nameless haha). Hope you enjoy that latest. :)**

**::**

Elena is going to kill Jeremy.

No really. She is.

She'd been okay with the whole 'he's gay, but not really, only with the mayor's son' thing.

She was okay with the whole covering for him when he came back way too late to be acceptable thing.

She'd even let it slide when she'd seen Tyler Lockwood climbing up their tree and into Jeremy's bedroom window, multiple times AND running into him in the middle of the night when she needed to pee.

But this?

This was unacceptable.

Did Jeremy really think that his stereo can drown out the sounds of them... of them _fucking? _(Elena isn't one for swear words, and even in her mind the word comes out as a whisper, but really there was no other word for it.)

Now, she isn't being judgmental, she really isn't. Her and Stefan have gotten carried away before (she blushes slightly at the memory), but from the sounds of it, Tyler Lockwood is an _animal. _

She didn't see him shimmy through the window this time, but it became apparent that he was there when the, now familiar, low murmuring of voices could be heard, barely distinguishable through the wall. When they fell silent, Elena squeezed her eyes shut, cringing at the thought of what might have been going on. But still, she wasn't going to moan or dwell on it. She's happy that Jeremy is happy now, _without _the use of drugs and alcohol. Plus _anything_ is better than Anna. She'd focused on her Physics notes, then, and soon forgot Tyler was even in the house.

Until the music started.

Well, first had come a muffled thump, and a low laugh that was definitely Tyler, and then a brief silence, before the sound of ceramic circling a wood surface sounded. Another laugh, and Elena assumed the lamp has been caught seeing as there wasn't the melody of shattering glass. _Then_ came the music.

It wasn't anything that Elena had never heard before. Loud. Abrasive. Not her style, in essence.

She'd time to ponder why Jeremy would even put the music on. The key to hooking up in your room, when your boyfriend doesn't have crazy ridiculous hearing and faster than a speeding bullet reflexes, is to be able to know when a threat was approaching.

Her pondering came to an abrupt end when the moans started floating through the walls. At first she thought it was part of the music (and she was no prude, but really? Blasting a song with moaning in it is just asking for Jenna to pound on the door). But as the minutes passed the moans became heavier and wasn't following any beat. It was when she tilted her head, ears perked up like a dog's, and eyes narrowed, that a sharp shout made her jump.

By the time she'd steadied herself on the bed the pieces had fallen into place. And she was annoyed.

Seriously, this was pushing it a little too far. She wasn't going to storm in there (God no), but she was going to pull out the soap box later on.

Ten minutes had passed with no extra 'instruments' before they started up again. But this time, if possible, they were louder. _Was it _both_ of them being so vocal?_ She shuddered at the mental picture that brought up (her little brother in any sexual situation wasn't something Elena wanted to picture, imagine, question), but could one guy... _sigh _and _moan_ so much? Elena idly thought that it was easier to distinguish the 'trouble-maker' through the walls if it was a guy and girl on the other side.

When the sighing turned into more of those sharp shouts, and what sounded like, and was most likely the bed thumping against the wall, Elena had to put her foot down.

She throws her notes and textbook aside, and strides to her bedroom door. Yanking it open, she steps into the hall, only to see Jenna making her way down the hallway, also, to what appears to be Jeremy's room. She's wearing a determined expression.

Elena's eyes widen. She doesn't want to hear Tyler and Jeremy do whatever they are certainly doing to each other, but she definitely doesn't want them to get caught at it. She rushes forward. "Hey, Jenna." She tries to come off nonchalant, but she sounds breathless and therefore not entirely convincing.

Luckily, Jenna doesn't really take notice. She's too busy eyeing Jeremy's door. Deciding to take the initiative (plus it would look suspicious if she just jumps between Jenna and the door, arms spread) Elena says, "Yeah, I know. I have no idea why he's playing it so loudly. I've been trying to ignore it, but..."

"I know." Jenna's brow is furrowed slightly at the wood. "I don't mind if he plays it a little loud, but this is ridiculous. I'm trying to get some work done." She looks at Elena now. "And you look awful. You're so pale. Do you have a headache? Your wall is right up against his."

"Yeah, yeah, I can hear... everything." Elena swallows hard, and tries not to look as disturbed as she feels.

Jenna shakes her head and makes a move towards the door, and Elena rushes to say, "it's okay though. I mean it's not, but I was gonna talk to him about it. You don't have to."

Jenna eyes the door some more. "Yeah, I know but, I need to enforce _something. _He's been listening to me a lot more lately. I want to keep the momentum going."

Elena can't help but think that Jenna is cute. Jeremy is only listening to her now because he wants to. He could easily ignore her and do what he pleases. Mainly because neither Jenna or Elena can physically stop him; he's built like their father was – tall, sturdy, broad shoulders, and strong neck. Plus even though he knows Jenna and Elena are okay with the whole Tyler thing, he's still cautious and is careful not to make waves so soon. But still, it's cute that Jenna wants to enforce rules. She honestly isn't the authoritative type.

Jenna moves to knock on the door and Elena almost jumps forward. Jenna looks at her oddly, but Elena speaks before she can ask what's wrong. She doesn't like lying, and it's not lying really, but she still feels bad about it.

"Thing is," she lowers her voice, even though there is no way in hell Jeremy (or Tyler) can hear what is going on on this side of the door, "I think I should talk to him. I know it seems like a little thing, asking him to turn down the music, but you know Jere. He's... sensitive. I mean, I'm pretty sure he knows we're okay about the Tyler thing, but he might see it as you picking at every little thing he's been doing lately."

Jenna opens her mouth to protest, but again Elena speaks before she can. "I know that's not the way it is. And I can't be sure that that's the way he'll see it, but... better safe than sorry?" She tries to give one of those convincing smiles she's seen Damon shooting around, but on her face it feels like a simper. She cringes inwardly.

Jenna doesn't look totally convinced, so Elena pushes a little more. "If I do it, I'm just being 'annoying Elena.' I'm always nagging him." Her aunt's eyes slide to the door again, and for a moment Elena thinks she's going to knock anyway, but then she nods and sighs.

"Alright. I get what you're saying. But, I mean," she looks sort of worried, "I don't want Jeremy to think that about Tyler. That I don't like him. Or them together. I always make sure to be ridiculously nice to the guy. When he comes over, I smile so much I think my face is going to split open. I don't know how his mother does it..."

Elena laughs a little, and Jenna gives her a small smile, and rubs her arm before turning around and heading back for her bedroom. Elena waits until the door is closed before she lets out the breath she didn't realize she was holding.

Her heart is still beating quickly as she faces the door. She raises her fist and pounds three times on the door. She waits and there is less noise under the music. She pounds three more times, and there is a scuffling and the music is turned down. "Jeremy," she says in a sing song voice. _The _voice. The voice that always meant impending doom for each other as children. The best example of what this tone represents is when Elena was eight years old and broke her mother's favorite vase by accident. She'd begged Jeremy not to tell, and he agreed, but only in exchange for Elena's promise to take over his share of the chores for two weeks. Whenever she'd been about to complain about the workload, he'd sing song her name, reminding her of the deal.

She knows that he recognizes the tone of voice, because she distinctly hears a murmured "shit" before he clears his throat and calls out "Yeah, Elena?"

She smiles somewhat evilly on the other side of the door, and is slightly disturbed to realize that it is another expression she's picked up from Damon. "Me and _Jenna," _she puts slight emphasis on their aunt's name, subtle enough for only her and Jeremy to pick up on, "are trying to work out here. Could you _keep the noise down?"_

There are three more beats of silence before he calls out, voice resigned, "Yeah, yeah, sorry."

"No problem, Jere," she says sweetly. She waits a few more seconds, but it's obvious neither Jeremy or Tyler are going to move a muscle until they hear her door close. The thought is tempting enough for her to stand out here all night, or just go back into her room and keep the door open.

But she isn't Damon, and she goes back into her room, closing the door a little harder than needed. When she sits on her bed she can hear movement, and what sounds like a laugh. The music turns back up a little, but nothing too offensive. She reaches over to pull her notes back into her lap, and spies her phone on the bed spread.

Grinning she picks it up, and starts a new message.

_**To: Jere**_

_**You owe me. ^.^**_

Less than a minute later her phone beeps.

_**From: Jere**_

_**I know =/**_


	3. 3

_They weren't high when they first kissed._

_Jeremy wasn't in some drugged up, wrecked, emotional state. They weren't drunk; well, there was one of the finest bottles of Mayor Lockwood's stash between them in the grass, but it wasn't anything they couldn't handle. A few swigs every couple of minutes wasn't doing any harm; certainly not enough to push them. Tyler wasn't a raving, distraught, drunken mess over his father. They weren't at a party and suddenly found themselves in a dark corner, and they hadn't been fighting and suddenly found their lips battling for a different kind of dominance._

_They were sitting in a clearing, the one with the lake a tiny babbling waterfall. It was that time of neither day nor night, that existence where the water, and the grass, and their skin was covered in a dull orange light. The kind of light that painted everything sienna, and made it all appear to be an old photograph._

_With a bottle of whisky between them and very few words it was quiet. They sat with their knees drawn up slightly and their arms resting carelessly on their legs._

_This wasn't such an odd arrangement, the two of them. Not anymore. The timeline of after Vicki and before the mayor found them already fighting less. Or fighting the same amount with half the heart. One would walk up to the other, assess, and hold out their offering- a white flag that more often than not took the form of a joint or a bottle. A truce, just for right now, it communicated. Hence the bottle separating them now, but in all honesty Jeremy didn't know why Tyler continued to offer cease fires. He was thinking the war was already over._

_He'd been thinking a lot lately._

_This night, right then in the near silence, and the smooth wind, the crickets, rippling water, and orange light, Jeremy was thinking. He had no idea what was going through the other boy's mind, but what was going through his own was a familiar thread._

Why?

_Why was he so aware of Tyler's body next to his? It was normal to feel a bit of awareness, they were the only humans in the immediate area, but his body shouldn't be heating up this much. He shouldn't be listening so intently to Tyler's breaths, lining both their inhalations up so that they exhaled quietly together, so why is he doing it? Why did his skin feel tight, and why was his heart beating quickly? That odd rhythm that is not enough to be pounding, but enough to be noticeable._

_Why did he keep feeling this way when Tyler was around? Why was he always thinking about Tyler? Why does he love the way the boy smells, and admire the way he moves, and itch to touch his skin? Why has this feeling been steadily getting stronger and stronger for months._

Why why why whywhywhywhywhy?

_The loop plays in his head so quickly he feels as if he's spinning. He squeezes his eyes shut, and when he opens them again the voice has simmered down, but it's still there, in the back of his mind._

_He takes solace in the small blessing, but after a few moments another, new, thought pops into his mind, clear as day._

Why not?

_Jeremy thinks he's going crazy._

_Well he thinks he should be thinking this, but oddly enough he isn't. He's actually berating himself slightly; why is this the first time this thought has occurred to him? Why is he just now thinking why not? He figures it must be this time of non time and strange light._

_He feels awfully calm as he ponders. His heart rate has slowed down, his mind is blissfully quiet and serene. He compares the feeling to those times when he was so deep into the drug scene that he found peace in knowing that he was so utterly and completely fucked. He thinks this is an appropriate feeling to equate it to, because if he does this and fails God knows what Tyler will do, or say._

_His change in mood must be tangible because he feels a gaze on his face and turns to see Tyler watching him._

_They stare at each other. Not a challenging stare - not their usual sizing up the opponent, or more frequent these days, the 'is my peace offering enough' stare. This one is mildly curious, but somehow Tyler doesn't look puzzled as to why Jeremy is looking at him so intently. It isn't until later that Jeremy realizes that this is because Tyler is doing the same._

_The gaze seems to go on forever, and according to a shift in the lighting it has been a while. With time shifting, moving into an hour that actually exists, Jeremy makes his decision._

_He looks away and without meeting Tyler's eyes, he carefully reaches down to pick up the bottle of whisky from between them and sets it aside. He moves closer until he can feel Tyler's body heat mingling with his own. He stares at the black and navy stripes on Tyler's shirt, before his eyes move up to the smooth skin of his neck. He keeps his gaze there for a few moments before traveling upwards again to look at his mouth. It isn't in a frown or a grimace. It isn't smiling right then, either. It's a neutral mouth, Jeremy decides._

_His eyes flick up to meet Tyler's briefly and surprisingly he isn't shocked to find that they don't harbor any hostility. They are carefully neutral just like the mouth._

_His heart is pounding in his chest again, and even though he's in the same pose he was in initially, his body is tight._

_He looks back at that mouth, and his stomach jumps. If Tyler was going to push him away he would have done it by now. That's the thought that is playing on a new loop in Jeremy's head as he counts to three (just like he would do as a kid when he was about to do something that terrified him) and moves._

_And suddenly, there are no more thoughts. There is no more doubt, or anxiety, or fear because his lips are on Tyler's, and even if Tyler were to push him away now and yell, and threaten, and hit, Jeremy would be fine, because this feels perfect._

_It's a soft press of lips. Jeremy meant to touch their lips together briefly and back off, but he can't possibly do that now. Not with this flood of calmness running through his veins - it's near impossible. His eyes have fallen shut, but they flutter when he feels Tyler's lips move against his. It's slow, hesitant, and Jeremy doesn't push. Just waits for him to adjust, because he knows he will adjust, and moments later the movements become more sure, sensual. What a first kiss should really be. Not a violent clash of tongue, and teeth, and snarling._

_Jeremy feels like a girl for thinking this, thinking of how first kisses should be. But then again he is kissing a guy... he is kissing Tyler Lockwood... And it was all to confusing to consider now. He'd think about it later._

_Right now he would focus on the feel of Tyler's mouth against his. The way their bodies had shifted closer together, and leaned into each other without adjusting their positions too much. The way Tyler took a sharp breath, like his stomach had just dropped quickly, when Jeremy ran his tongue along the seam of his lips lightly, tasting but not entering. The way Tyler smelled clean and fresh, like soap. The way Tyler tasted - like whisky, and rain._

_The kiss wasn't too long, a few minutes, and as they pulled away Tyler bites down gently on Jeremy's bottom lip, sucking on it. He lets it slip out of his mouth slowly, and gives it a light kiss before pulling back slightly._

_Jeremy keeps his eyes closed as he faces Tyler. His heart was racing, and his body was covered in goosebumps, and his breath was slightly shaky. He needed to open his eyes, he knew that but he didn't want to yet. He didn't want to see the light shifting into day._

_A few seconds pass and he still hasn't opened his eyes when he feels Tyler shift, and a forehead is pressed against his. His heart feels so full, so quickly, right at that moment that he lets out a startled puff of air._

_Jeremy can feel Tyler moving with him, lining up their breaths perfectly so that they inhale together._

_He opens his eyes._

**oooooooo**

"Do you think we'll ever tell anyone?"

They are lying on their backs on Tyler's bed. It's night and the room is dark, with only the partial moon for light. Jeremy is looking at Tyler's profile bathed in the cool tones of the night sky. They've been lying there for hours, just like this. No kissing, no talking, just laying next to each other, thinking, shifting, breathing. Jeremy's question doesn't disturb the peace as much as he thought it would. His voice came out softer than he had intended.

Jeremy watches as Tyler blinks, and stare at the ceiling. He doesn't answer Jeremy's question and soon, he shuts his eyes.


	4. 4

Jeremy wonders sometimes if they can make this work. Make _them _work.

Like right now, he is sitting at a table in the Grill, nursing a soda, and watching Tyler simultaneously ignore him and play pool with Matt. Well, ignore isn't the right word. He and Tyler did arrive together, which would have been odd before, but once everyone had gotten over the initial surprise of the two of them getting along, they had all gotten fairly used to it, and didn't really look twice anymore. So, no, Tyler wasn't ignoring him. He was just... not acting the way he usually did when they were alone.

And Jeremy gets it, he does. For one, he doesn't _expect_ Tyler to treat him _exactly _the way he does when they are alone. That would no doubt call for a warning on indecent public behavior from the sheriff. And he doesn't expect them to be all touchy feely (they aren't really that touchy feely when they're alone, except on those few occasions when Tyler will rub his thumb on the inside of Jeremy's wrist or touch the small of his back. But to Jeremy, those little things seem like either unconscious actions or little experiments Tyler has set up in his own mind.) And Jeremy doesn't want to be... _cuddled_ in public or anything. He wouldn't mind kissing though. Not that hes all for PDA, but he enjoys kissing Tyler so much and he _would_ like the freedom to do it where ever he wanted. But he knows that this is out of the question. Not just because Jeremy certainly does _not_ want to be outed, _again_, but also, even though he's lived in this town for his whole life, he doesn't know the views on two males kissing in public. Which may sound like an odd thing he should know, but Jeremy bets that if you were to ask any member of any town how fellow neighbors would react to two males kissing at the local hangout spot, they'd have an answer right away.

But Jeremy doesn't know how this town would react because, honestly, Jeremy questions if they would even notice. There are vampires who reside here, there are strange faces that arrive seemingly out of nowhere (also mostly vampires), people are dropping like flies, and all the while no one bats an eye, besides the Council of course. Jeremy has never heard one person ask what kind of 'animal' it is exactly that is attacking these people and ripping their throats out. Their town is relatively small, and close knit. It's not like it's New York City or anything, and frankly the death toll is way to high for such a small place. But still, no one questions...

But it would just be his luck, wouldn't it, if people noticed that Tyler Lockwood pressed his hand briefly to Jeremy's lower back. The school would be up in arms. Maybe.

He watches Tyler some more, tilting his head to the side as Tyler rounds the side of the oak table, bends over slightly, and hits a red ball into a corner pocket. He straightens up, and his eyes slide over the table first, before he looks up to see Jeremy watching him. Before they left Jeremy's Tyler had warned him against being too obvious (this didn't sit well with Jeremy. Not because he doesn't agree, but because he's heard that warning before, from Vicky, and he hated it then.) Jeremy guesses he will get a talking to about his staring when they get back in the car, but he's not too worried. By the look of Tyler's slight smile as his gaze slides back down onto the green table, Jeremy figures he's not in too much trouble.

Jeremy looks away and smiles into his glass. He loves the private smiles and looks between them. He loves having this little secret right now. He didn't much enjoy it before because he hated having to sneak around, but once his family knew he had to admit he'd felt much better about it. The people who know now are the one who _need_ to know (and Alaric) and Jeremy is satisfied with that, but he wonders when that won't be enough anymore.

And that is where his problem lies.

Because even though he might not want to be touched and grabbed and doesn't mind not being kissed in public for right now, he knows that it will be a problem later on (he has no doubt that they will keep this relationship going for a while, surprisingly enough) and become a strain on their relationship. He knows one day this sneaking around will cease to be exciting, and new, and just become stressful. He knows that one day he and Tyler (probably known to be 'best friends' by then) will be out with friends, and Jeremy will have to leave a bit earlier than Tyler. He will automatically lean over to kiss the other boy goodbye, remember he can't, and the whole thing will no doubt end in an awkward bro hug.

They don't hold hands now, nor do they really want to, neither one of them really being hand holders, but one day they'll be comfortable enough with each other to want to, but they wont be able to. Not in Mystic Falls anyway, and Jeremy still has three more years to go.

Jeremy dwells on this last thought. Three years. They'll definitely know how they feel about each other and where they stand in three years. And that's a plus because as of right now, they still aren't sure. Jeremy knows how he feels about Tyler. Or at least knows how Tyler makes him feel - way too happy. Way too comfortable, and passionate, and crazy. He gets these insanely strong urges to touch him sometimes. Just the need to run his fingers through his short hair, or tug on his shirt, or kiss his neck, and he has no idea why. And he supposes that's what they're both trying to figure out now. Why the change.

But honestly, Jeremy isn't really concerned about figuring out the 'why' right now, not as much as he was in the beginning, and certainly not as much as Tyler is. Jeremy knows how hard he's trying, how hard he thinks about this whole thing. Trying to figure it all out, trying to figure Jeremy out. He looks at Jeremy sometimes as if he is a puzzle. Jeremy pretends not to notice. He likes it when Tyler looks at him like this.

Despite his somewhat morose thoughts, Jeremy has hope. He'd expected Tyler to push him away immediately. He'd thought Tyler would stay far away from him; to either figure what the hell was going on, or just as a means to push Jeremy away entirely and deny the whole thing never happened and would never happen. But Jeremy had been pleasantly surprised when Tyler stuck around while trying to work through whatever was going through his head. He feels a warm buzz go through him at this thought. Tyler liked him enough to stay, even when he was so confused...

Jeremy is pulled out of his thoughts by a gentle hand on his shoulder. He looks up to see Elena looking down at him. Behind her, Jeremy can see Damon and Stefan sit at the bar and start bickering about something. "Hey Jere. You okay?"

He nods up at her, and gives a small smile. "Yeah, why?"

"No reason. You just looked miles away."

"Oh, yeah. Just thinking." She looks concerned, and lifts her eyes discreetly to look over at where Matt and Tyler were finishing up. Jeremy's smile widens slightly at her inquisitive manner. "I'm sure. Promise."

"Alright." She doesn't look totally convinced, but she squeezes his shoulder and smiles back down at him. A flood of warmth fills Jeremy, again, quite suddenly and he finds himself wrapping an arm around her thin legs and hugging her to him. She smells like she always smells, like her strawberry shampoo, and light perfume, and he is so grateful for that in this moment it almost overwhelms him. _God, I am becoming such a girl_.

Elena gives a surprised, happy laugh, and hugs him back. When they pull away her eyes are bright. "What was that for?"

To make up for his brief lapse in emotional control, even for him, he shrugs and says nonchalantly, "No reason. Just thought I'd give the every five years hug. I might be a little early." Elena laughs. He knows she sees right through him, but she lets him have this one, and scratches the nape of his neck gently before throwing out the customary "don't be home too late" and he gives the customary "yeah yeah yeah."

He watches her walk over to Stefan and Damon and step smoothly between their argument. She says a few words, kisses Stefan, and apparently says something cheeky to Damon because he gives her that sarcastic smile he gives when someone gives him lip. Jeremy watches as Elena looks away to speak to Stefan again, and his own eyes narrow as he watches Damon's expression morph slowly from sarcastic to hungry as he takes Elena and her shining eyes in.

_Hm._

Then Damon's gaze is suddenly meeting his, but a second later a body slides in next to Jeremy and he turns his head to see Tyler. Jeremy's heart and stomach gave an involuntary tug at the sight of him, and he has to pry his eyes away from the other boy's to look at Matt, who is now blocking Damon from view.

Tyler's body heat, so naturally high, is distracting him, and he has a hard time concentrating on Matt saying he should have joined the two of them for the last game. "Next time," he says and Matt nods in response. Tyler and Matt proceeded to talk about football and Jeremy allows himself to drift off again. He isn't expected to participate in this conversation, and he is glad for it. He'd rather focus on the way Tyler feels against his side, and how he smells, and how Jeremy can feel his body shift and move, and that he knows how that body shifts and moves and looks without any clothes on at all-

There is a hand on his thigh. "Jere?"

"Hm?" He looks over at Matt, trying to ignore how his knee is scorching under the heat of Tyler's palm.

"I said do you want anything? I'm going up to get food." He hadn't seen Tyler's hand move to rest on Jeremy's leg and therefore probably doesn't understand why Jeremy stares blankly at him for five seconds too long, before blinking, and saying in an oddly strangled voice, "No, no I'm fine."

Matt looks like he wants to say more but instead he just shakes his head, stating that he'd be right back. His exit from the seat reveals Damon staring straight at their table, a smirk on his face. Jeremy knows he sees him and Tyler being together as some joke, and his annoyance spikes.

Jeremy feels a nerve in his cheek twitch. Instead of getting angry, though, he just narrows his eyes slightly, and looks into Damon's eyes for a moment longer, before shifting his gaze to rest on Elena, only to look back at Damon with a raised eyebrow.

Damon wets his bottom lip slightly while holding Jeremy's stare. He feels Tyler's hand squeeze his thigh in question, but Jeremy doesn't look over at him. A minute or two passes of this staring contest; soon Jeremy sees Damon's nostrils flare slightly before he rolls his eyes, and twists back around in his seat to face the bar.

Jeremy allows himself a small victory smile, and turns to look at Tyler.


	5. 5

**A/N: Just wanted to thank you all for faving, setting alerts, and reviewing! Special thanks to barcodestripped for her great reviews on every chapter, and my best friend Tara! Hope you enjoy!**

**=..=...=...=...=**

Tyler knows that he is handling this in one of the worst possible ways, but he really can't stop. It's like his brain is on autopilot and the button to get it off said setting is jammed. Or just not there at all.

Even as Bri Lancaster is running her hand up his arm and over his shoulder in an attempt to seduce, his brain is urging _no, no, no, _but his lips are forming into an automatic, flirtatious smile. Not a genuine smile, but damn near. And the thing is, he doesn't _want_ to be smiling at Bri, but this is what Tyler Lockwood does. He plays football, roughs around, and flirts with girls. He doesn't _want_ to flirt with her, (even though she is smoking hot. Those legs...) but he has to keep up appearances. At least for now. Until he knows what the hell is going on for sure with him and his new... interests. The main of which is making his way over to where Tyler is, and not looking too happy.

It's a bright sunny day; the kind where the weather is perfect, not too warm and not chilly enough yet for heavy sweaters, and the school parking lot is full of people. Matt is sitting on top of the bench right behind Tyler, and he and Bonnie are laughing about something that Tyler can't make out. He's too focused on trying to convince himself to move his feet, or at least stop smiling, and saying encouraging things.

Bri flips her long blonde hair, and smiles slyly. Her hand moves down to rest on his stomach. He remembers right then that Bri Lancaster has been after him for awhile... but he's been avoiding her. The reason for which he can't …. quite... -

His eyes narrow slightly as he remembers suddenly. They'd hooked up before, and what had been a bit of drunken fun for him at a party had been a little more for her. He remembers that night clearly now. He'd gotten more than a little drunk (that night had been rough for him. He'd won the football game, but his father had still given him hell about a fumbled pass) and Bri had stumbled into his arms. Arms that Tyler didn't even know he had been holding out, but who was he to deny a hot, horny, drunk blonde. Their combined drunken clumsiness had resulted in them falling onto a couch. A couch that had held a few people, including a disgusted looking Jeremy Gilbert.

_Fuck._

"...repeat performance?" Bri is purring into his ear when he emerges from his memories.

"Uh," Tyler's brain cannot catch up to her words, and her perfume is making his nose itch.

"Hey, man."

"Hey, Jere"

Jeremy nods his head at Matt and says hey to Bonnie. Tyler has to say something, he can't ignore him. They've been fine lately to everyone else, and they can't just go back to ignoring each other. That's the excuse he gives himself when his voice comes out with a very slightly needy undertone. He turns his head away from Bri's and _finally, _takes a step back. "Hey man."

Jeremy doesn't even look in his direction, but throws a "hey, Tyler" at him. He does it in a way that doesn't draw anyone's attention. He's scanning the parking lot, and it seems as if he's distracted instead of actually brushing Tyler off.

Fingers brush against his, and a thumb rubs over his knuckles. Bri is trying to get his attention again, but Tyler can't be bothered. He watches Jeremy look out into the field and then back to the parking lot. "You guys seen Elena?"

"Nah, why."

Jeremy looks back at Matt when he answers. "She has my key. She told me she'd meet me here after class."

"Well, she texted me, earlier" Bonnie says. "Her Physics class is running over, but that was ten minutes ago. She should be here soon."

Jeremy nods and looks down at his feet before looking out onto the football field again. Matt and Bonnie go back to whatever they were talking about (some fund raiser Caroline is going crazy over Tyler catches now) and Bri moves closer so her chest rubs against his. The movement causes him to tear his eyes away from Jeremy's profile

"So, how about it?"

"What?" Tyler really feels like pushing her away. His mind is fuzzy and he can't think straight because of it. But he has to keep up appearances. Right?

"Why don't we get out of here and go have some fun?" She says the last few words in a low voice, but Jeremy tenses anyway. Tyler can _feel _ the anger radiating off of him.

"Uh-"

"Hey, Jere." Elena has apparently just gotten out of class, and she looks slightly out of breath. She must have sped walked over. "Sorry, about that. We got out late. Hey Bon, Matt." She rummages through her bag while she speaks. Matt and Bonnie say hello to both Elena and Stefan, who is standing behind her.

Stefan smiles at both of them and waits until they're not looking in his direction to affix his gaze on Tyler. He's not smiling anymore, and his eyes dart to Tyler's hand in Bri's.

Tyler jerks his hand out of Bri's, and she gives out an indignant sort of huff, but rallies quickly by moving even closer to him. And what in the hell perfume is that? He needs to sneeze.

Jeremy's jaw is tight as he waits for Elena to pull the key out of her purse. She blows her hair out of her face, and finally lifts a key chain out of her bag. "Thanks for letting me borrow it, I'm going to look for mine tonight when I get hom- Are you okay?"

Everyone looks at Jeremy now, except Stefanwho's own eyes are still on Tyler. His expression is a cross between annoyance and slightly interested.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Just not feeling too well right now."

"Oh, well do you want me to drive you home?" She looks concerned.

Jeremy shakes his head.

"No that's okay. It's just a headache."

"I could take you home." Tyler doesn't realize he's the one who's blurted this out until everyone is looking at him. Bri lets out another indignant sound.

"I thought you were driving _me _home, Ty."

Elena, who hasn't really noticed Tyler until now, looks confused for a second before she takes in the whole image of Tyler and Bri standing so close together, along with the girl's exclamation. When she makes the connection her eyes narrow dangerously.

It occurs to Tyler, again, that he could have easily avoided this by just brushing Lancaster off. He doesn't know now why he didn't. He'd been avoiding her all this time anyway. If anything, it must seem more odd that he's giving her the time of day all of a sudden.

"No," Jeremy says a little too sharply. He snatches the key from Elena, who looks back up at him, and says through gritted teeth "I'll walk."

He brushes past Tyler and Bri, and Tyler watches as he walks off, those shoulders he loves so much tense under the thin T-shirt. He's almost hesitant to look back at his friends, but he does anyway. Well, first he looks down to see Bri looking annoyed. Looking up shows Matt and Bonnie looking confused, Elena looking murderous, and Stefan with his eyes closed, squeezing the bridge of his nose.

"Whaaat, was that all about?" Bonnie asks. She looks over at Elena who doesn't answer, but, is instead, still glaring. Matt is looking at him now too, but his head is tilted to the side and he looks curious. Tyler has time to think he hates that look on Matt's face, and always has because Matt is too fucking preceptive for his own damn good, before he hears Bri huff somewhere in the vicinity of his chest. They all watch her gather up her bag, mutter "whatever," and stalk off.

All eyes are back on him way too soon, and Tyler feels very uncomfortable.

"We need to go talk to him, Stefan." Finally, Elena isn't glaring at him anymore, but her voice is like steel.

She starts to walk off in the direction Jeremy has gone, before Stefan grabs her arm gently and says in a soothing voice, "Let him cool off first. You know how he is. He won't talk to either one of us right now."

Elena looks reluctant, but she nods anyway. She throws one last glare at Tyler, hands Stefan her car keys, and pushes past Tyler to head to the parking lot. Stefan's mouth twists up into a kind of pity filled smile, and he scratches under an eyebrow with a thumb as he goes to follow her.

Tyler feels helpless, Matt is still looking too fucking curious, and Bonnie still looks confused.

"So, I take it no one is going to explain?"

_Fuck._

**=..=..=..=..=**

"There are a _lot _ of people who are angry at you in here."

Tyler looks down at the wood of the Gilbert's front porch. Night had already fallen when he'd finally gotten up enough courage to come over here. He'd called Jeremy about twenty times, but after a while the calls just went straight to voicemail and, well, Tyler hates leaving messages.

He was relieved when Jenna was the one to answer the door, but now he feels like that was a foolish reaction to have. She doesn't look as angry as Elena or Jeremy did earlier, but she sure doesn't look happy to see him. What he'd give for one of her _smiles_ right about now

"Yeah. I know."

She stays quiet and Tyler can hear the night crickets and someone moving around inside of the house. He looks up to see her scrutinizing him. He stuffs his hands into his pockets and rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet. He's never had to stand on a girl's doorstep to explain himself for something. Tyler's never really had a girlfriend, or anyone like that that he's really felt the need to explain himself to. He's not exactly sure how he feels about having somebody, a few somebodies actually (Elena has such judgy eyes), to have to justify his actions to who isn't his father. He doesn't know the right thing to do or say in this situation, so he just looks at one of the hanging lanterns, and figures he'll just walk away when the awkwardness becomes too much to bear, or Jenna gets tired of standing in the doorway and shuts him out.

He's staring at the stitching on one of the pillows in the chair next to his leg when he hears Jenna sigh and shift. She backs up and Tyler figures this is when he gets shut out, but he pauses in his turning away when she says, "Wait right here. I'd let you in, but Elena wants to kill you, and Stefan already made it clear he wouldn't step in."

She shuts the door quietly, and Tyler just blinks at the oak. When the doorknob starts to turn again a minute later, Tyler's heart jumps into his throat and he realizes belatedly that he didn't even consider what he was going to tell Jeremy when he finally saw him again. He should have left a voice message. He has no idea what-

"What do you want?" Jeremy is standing in the doorway looking down at him. He always forgets that Jeremy is slightly taller than him. Most of the time it doesn't make a difference, but right now Tyler feels mildly intimidated. Another feeling he's not used to.

Jeremy looks closed off and slightly annoyed. Probably because Tyler isn't saying anything, just staring into Jeremy's face like an idiot. But Tyler can't help it. He never thought there would ever be a day when he cared if Jeremy Gilbert's face was closed off to him or not. Maybe because this is the first time he's seen it like this. Jeremy's emotions are always so easily read, always so raw. If he's angry, depressed, happy, everyone knows. But he's never this carefully posed, face shuttered, arms crossed. Tyler's stomach slips a bit.

Jeremy rolls his eyes and moves to go back into the house, and Tyler blurts out, "No."

"What?"

"Don't go back inside."

Jeremy rolls his eyes again, but steps outside and shuts the door behind him.

There's that awkward silence again and Jeremy is getting irate, Tyler can tell.

"You came here to stand on my porch and waste my time?"

"No," Tyler says. "I came here to talk to you."

"Then talk."

Silence.

After two minutes of nothing, Jeremy scoffs and turns back around.

"I'm sorry."

Jeremy stops, but doesn't turn back around right away.

"I'm sorry, about today. I didn't... I wasn't thinking."

Jeremy turns to face him now. "You weren't?"

"No."

"So it was automatic for you to let _Bri Lancaster"_ he says the name like its a disease (and it's kind of justified; the girl does have a reputation) "hang all over you?"

"Yes. What? I mean, no."

"But you weren't thinking." Jeremy's voice hasn't risen, but the hairs on Tyler's arms stand up like Jeremy has just shouted at him. "So, you were on automatic. You just assumed it was alright. You aren't tied to anyone."

"No, Jere-"

"It's alright. I get it." Jeremy is shaking his head, and Tyler's heart plummets.

"Get it? Get what?"

"That this," he gestures between the two of them, "was just a 'thing' that happened-"

Tyler feels angry suddenly. "A _thing _that_ happened? _You think I," he lowers his voice, " _fuck_ guys on a regular basis? You think I let dudes I _barely_ even know _out _me at a dinner table every other Thursday night?"

Jeremy just shrugs and says blandly, "I don't know what you do, Tyler."

Tyler feels like throwing his hands up, but he satisfies himself by just raising his left hand to his ear to tug it briefly before lowering it back down. "Well, Jere, I'll tell you now, I don't. I've only done that stuff with you, let it happen because of you."

"And whatever we've done, or you've let happen, clearly can't stand up to Bri Lancaster." There's a certain something to Jeremy's voice that Tyler can't place right now due to his frustration. He might not have much experience arguing with women, but he doesn't have to. Not when he has Jeremy fucking Gilbert twisting his words around like this.

"What? No, Jeremy-" Tyler mimics Stefan from earlier and squeezes the bridge of his nose. He's trying not to blow up at Jeremy, but it's getting harder and harder not to. He actually wants to punch him. But they don't do that anymore. Right?

Tyler shakes his head and tries again. "I was just trying to act natural. You know we can't let anyone know, yet. We agreed. Unless you _wanted _Damon fucking Salvatore to go frolicking through Mystic Falls telling everyone, and you just pretended you didn't-"

"There are ways to act natural without letting girls hang all over you-"

"What the fuck, Jeremy! I wasn't going to do anythin-"

"You weren't?" Jeremy scoffs. "Thought you were giving her a ride home. How'd that go?"

Tyler feels like his head is about to explode. It's aching, and he doesn't want to argue anymore. The fight drains out of him suddenly, and he just shakes his head and looks off into the distance, unseeing. "I didn't take her home, Jere." They can hear the crickets again for a few minutes. "I won't do it again." Jeremy stays quiet, and Tyler's irritation spikes again. "I don't know what you want me to say."

Tyler turns away and stares off of the porch into the dark street. He hears Jeremy shift behind him, and let out a rush of air. "Yeah, well, neither do I."

Tyler doesn't move as he listens to Jeremy open the door again, and he still doesn't move for a few minutes after the door is shut.

Finally, he realizes that he doesn't know what he's waiting for, and doesn't look back when walks down the stairs to his car.


	6. 6

It takes three days for Jeremy to get over himself.

Three days of avoiding eyes in the hallways and of his head brimming with thoughts and possible solutions. Three days for Jeremy to figure out exactly why he'd been as bothered as he was, and why he hadn't accepted Tyler's apology.

Saturday afternoon finds him at Tyler's doorstep. It's another one of those perfect days, but he hardly notices, except to acknowledge the fact that if he hadn't texted Tyler to ask him to be home this trip would have been for naught.

He'd woken up that morning early enough to watch the sun rise through his window. He'd laid in bed for hours, and all he could think was that he was tired of this stupid argument. That he should have just accepted Tyler's apology instead of dragging this whole thing out for too long. He'd finally admitted to himself that he wasn't just mad at Tyler for just letting Bri hang all over him, but also for something that wasn't even relevant to either of them anymore.

When he'd seen Bri hanging all over him, all Jeremy could think about was Vicki. That Vicki had tossed him aside for Tyler, and now Tyler was going to do the same for Bri. But that wasn't the end of it; his mind had done a mindfuck on him, and for a few moments, Bri was Vicki, and she and Tyler were kissing, and Jeremy had no idea who'd tossed him aside for whom, but it didn't matter anyway because the end result was the same. Combine that slip in sanity with the warnings of never letting anyone know about them, and Jeremy literally felt like time had stopped, and reversed, and he was back in the same situation he was in before.

But he knew this wasn't fair to Tyler. He knew that what he had had with Vicky was totally different from what he and the other boy had together. He and Tyler actually had a _very _good reason for keeping this just between the two of them and the few that knew. This wasn't like Vicki, when she'd just used him for drugs and told him to stay hidden because she couldn't bear being seen with someone a year or two younger than her.

He'd loved Vicki, but she'd shunned him more often than not. But Tyler... He wasn't sure how deep his feelings ran for him, but not once has Tyler turned him away. Even with Bri there, Jeremy had heard that slight begging undertone to Tyler's voice, even though at the time he'd pretended he didn't. He'd been too blinded with the past that he hadn't given Tyler a chance.

Jeremy was letting Tyler off the hook easily this time; what he'd done was inappropriate, but he was new to this, and he hadn't meant to hurt Jeremy, and Jeremy knew that.

With all these thoughts swirling through his head as he watched the sun move across his bedroom, there was one that was the most persistent; _I just want to see him._

By the time he'd gotten up, showered, and ate, it was eleven o clock. And it was 12: 06 by the time he'd gotten up the nerve to text Tyler the very simple _Can I come over?_

Seventeen minutes later he'd gotten his answer, and had taken his time walking to the Lockwood Mansion. He was happy that by the time he'd gotten out of bed Elena was gone. He didn't feel like dealing with her sad eyes, and indignation towards Tyler. She was gone early and back late a lot nowadays and Jeremy assumed it had something to do with vampires; the idea that had once fascinated him so much had by now gotten too complicated and stressful to deal with.

He kept waiting to hear her slip up and mention werewolves just so he could officially declare his life as a scene in Twilight.

Yeah, he'd read the books.

They sucked.

His thoughts of Twilight had somehow carried him all the way to his destination, and now he was waiting for someone to answer his ring.

The door swung open a few seconds later, and Tyler's uncle stood there. His eyes narrowed slightly, and he leaned against the door frame.

"Yeah?"

Jeremy had no idea what the hell was up with the Lockwood family. Mrs. Lockwood was nice enough (even if most of it was an act, but at least she pretended), Mr. Lockwood had been a douche of epic proportions (who the hell eggs on two high school boys to fight, especially when one of them is your son?), Tyler had tried to fight him everyday before their relationship took a turn for the much better, and now Mason Lockwood is blocking the doorway. He has the same look in his eyes now that he'd had at the funeral. That 'back-off' expression. That look that said 'leave or I'll make you.' _Maybe it's just me_, Jeremy thought. Maybe (for some reason he wasn't aware of) the Lockwoods just hated him, and no one else.

He doesn't dwell on it. "Uh, I'm here to see Tyler?" Jeremy hates that it comes out like a question, but he doesn't wince like he wants to.

Mason eyes him for a moment more, and Jeremy wonders what the hell he's looking for. Finally he steps aside and gestures towards the swooping staircase. "He's upstairs."

Jeremy nods and steps around him. He ignores the sensation of eyes on his back as he walks up the stairs.

He'd only been in Tyler's room once. It had actually been the same day he'd met Mason Lockwood. After being sent away, he'd found the bathroom just fine, but couldn't help wandering around the huge house. He'd known when he'd found Tyler's bedroom, mainly because it looked exactly the way he'd thought it would look. (Not that he'd given much thought to what Tyler's room would look like or anything.) The space was full of heavy dark wood, and deep greens and blues. There were trophies on one wall, and football, basketball, and hockey magazines scattered around, along with what looked like a football jersey balled up in a corner. Jeremy could also admit now that he'd also known who's room this was right away because of the way it smelled. Just like Tyler; like his cologne, and laundry detergent.

He finds the room by memory, and doesn't give himself time to hesitate before he raises his fist to knock.

"Yeah," comes a voice through the door, and Jeremy turns the doorknob, takes a calming breath and steps inside of the bedroom. It looks just like it did before, only now it's cleaner, and Tyler is sitting on the bed, facing the door. He's wearing a dark green polo shirt, with dark jeans, and no shoes, just white socks. Jeremy's heart skips a beats at the way he looks sitting there, looking at him. _Straight_ at him and not at his shoulder or over his head like he had been doing all week long.

Jeremy shuts the door behind him, turning the lock without really thinking about it, and leans back against the wood. He wants to sit next to Tyler, but he knows that if he does, he wont be able to focus, which is vital as he's not exactly sure he knows what he wants to say. He has a gist; he'd been planning to work it out in his head on the walk here, but horribly written stories had somehow gotten him distracted.

"Hey," he says, not least of all to break the silence.

"Hey." Tyler looks wary, and a little tired.

There are a few beats of silence. Why is it so hard for them to talk to each other? You'd think that after all the things they'd done and gotten past it would get easier.

"I think your uncle hates me."

Tyler just shrugs and gets up from the bed to walk to his dresser. He doesn't retrieve anything from it though; he looks like he's moving just to move. Like being in the same room with Jeremy makes him uncomfortable.

Jeremy sighs. He just needs to stop stalling and just say it. "Look, I'm sorry." Tyler doesn't say anything, but he stops wandering aimlessly around the room, and turns to face Jeremy again, arms folded across his chest. "I'm sorry that I gave you a hard time. Well, gave you a harder time than I should have." Tyler makes a sort of disbelieving noise and shakes his head. "What?"

"You kept twisting my words around. Everything I said you just..." he fades off and unfolds his arms. He starts moving again. It occurs to Jeremy then that Tyler is _very_ different with him. Any other time, any other fight, with any other person and Tyler would have been aggressive, getting his point across by talking loudly, or at least finishing his sentences. But now he's quieter, and more willing to listen. This realization makes Jeremy that much more willing to get this whole thing done and over with.

"Sorry. It wasn't all your fault. I mean, I was thinking about something else. I should have known you wouldn't have done anything. I probably overreacted."

"What were you thinking about?"

Jeremy blinks. "What?"

"What else were you thinking about that had you angry?"

"Well, _you _had me-"

"You know what I mean."

Jeremy sighs. "Nothing, it's not important."

Tyler stops walking and looks over at him, his expression annoyed. "I'd say it was important. You took your anger for something else out on me-"

"Oh like you haven't," Jeremy scoffs.

"You're right. I haven't. Not since we started this, I haven't" Jeremy feels slightly ashamed as he realizes that this is true. He also considers the fact that the person who Tyler's anger stemmed most is dead now, so there isn't as much to anger vent anymore, but Jeremy thinks its best not to say this. He's here to make up with his boyfriend, not start another fight. "So, what were you thinking about?"

Jeremy really doesn't want to tell Tyler he was thinking about Vicki. It'll only make him feel uncomfortable, and stupid, and move them farther back progress wise.

"It really doesn't matter, Tyler, I promise. It was stupid."

He expects Tyler to push the point, but he doesn't. Instead he says, "You argue like a chick."

Jeremy's eyebrows shoot up. "What?"

"You argue like a chick." The corner of Tyler's mouth is turned up in a small smile, and Jeremy takes that as a good sign.

"No, I don't."

"You do." Tyler walks around his desk to go back to the bed. He sits down and leaves enough space for Jeremy to sit next to him. "You twist everything I say into something bad."

Jeremy smirks and pushes himself off of the door. He takes the seat next to Tyler, but doesn't sit too closely. "That's called arguing well, not arguing like a girl."

"Girls are good at arguing."

"True." They smile, but continue to look down at their feet. A few minutes pass in a comfortable silence before Jeremy turns his head to look at Tyler's profile. "Don't do it again," he says in a low, serious voice. "Next time, I won't care what your excuse is."

Tyler doesn't say anything but nods down at the floor. The bed shifts, and he looks up to see that Jeremy has moved closer.

Jeremy's body is humming with warm energy. He's missed being this close to Tyler. He'd hated seeing him around and not being able to smile or talk to him. He moves even closer so that their legs are touching, thighs pressing together, and he leans in to place his lips against the side of Tyler throat.

Tyler moves back a bit but Jeremy follows. He places another kiss on the hollow of his neck and can hear the smile in Tyler's voice as he murmurs, "I'm letting you off way too easy."

"Funny," Jeremy moves up to kiss Tyler's strong jaw, "I thought the same thing this morning." He smiles against Tyler's skin.

When their lips meet, both are curved upwards slightly. Tyler relaxes his mouth right away to allow Jeremy's tongue to slip inside. Jeremy can't help the small hum of pleasure he emits, and doesn't feel at all embarrassed when Tyler lets out a small laugh. "Miss me?"

Jeremy just nods and leans in further. He lifts his hand to run his fingers through the short hairs on the back of Tyler's neck, and he grips them slightly. His chest feels light, and his head is swimming, and he feels utterly content.

Tyler raises his hand to hold onto Jeremy's wrist and he strokes it lightly. A shiver runs through Jeremy and he deepens the kiss, while adjusting himself so that he's got one knee up on the bed. Tyler takes the hint and, without breaking contact, backs up so that he's laying in the middle of the bed, with Jeremy on top. The lengths of their bodies mold together perfectly, and Jeremy has to take a deep breath in attempt to slow his speeding heart.

His leg slips between Tyler's and they move their hips at the same time and Jeremy's heart seems to stop completely for a moment. He buries his face into the other boy's clean smelling neck, and Tyler takes the opportunity to flip them over. Now he's on top, and Jeremy would never admit it, but he loves this. He loves being beneath this strong body, loves giving up control. Tyler leans back so that he is straddling one of Jeremy's thighs, and he rips his shirt over his head. Then he pulls Jeremy up by the front own shirt and Jeremy lifts his arms, and allows his own T shirt to be pulled off and thrown to the side. He lies back onto the pillows and Tyler follows him down, warm smooth skin sliding together, and making them sigh into each other's mouths. Jeremy slides his hands down Tyler's back and slips his hands into the back pockets of the boy's jeans. He squeezes the demin clad flesh in his hands, and presses down as he rolls his own hips up.

He feels Tyler's breath hitch, and suddenly things change pace, from languid and exploratory, to urgent and needy. Tyler's fingers, which are buried in Jeremy's shaggy hair, tighten for a moment and then his hands move down and they are everywhere, and he's moving his hips faster even as he slips a hand down to unfasten the button on Jeremy's jeans. Jeremy takes his hands out of the boy's pockets, and slides them around so that he can work on Tyler's pants too, but their hips are too close together and all they succeed in doing is bumping hands and tangling fingers.

Jeremy gets slightly frustrated; he's so close to touching Tyler and the enthusiasm of their movements are holding him up. He bucks his hips, and Tyler raises up off of him slightly. Before he can settle back down, Jeremy grips his hip and holds him up; he uses his other hand to unfasten Tyler's pants fully. By now Tyler understands what Jeremy is trying to do, so he braces himself with one hand on the bed and does the same.

The second Jeremy has the zipper down, he reaches in and wraps a warm hand around hot, heavy, damp flesh. The hand holding Tyler up trembles, and he lowers himself so he's resting on his forearm. Jeremy gives a few slow long lazy pulls, and then gives one firm, sharp tug and Tyler's hips jerk into his hand. He has to rest his forehead against Jeremy's for a moment, but then his hand is working again, and seconds later Jeremy feels Tyler's hand wrap around him and pull, and his eyes flutter and slide shut.

They stroke each other slowly at first, lazily taking their time. Jeremy feels odd – his heart is beating quickly but this is the most relaxed he's been a long while. He lets the pleasure run through his body, lets his head fall back into the pillows. He can feel Tyler's lips kiss his ear, his temple, his cheek, and jaw, and neck. He arches his back when teeth gently sink into his neck, and a tongue soothes the spot. He feels high, like he's popped a pill and is floating, but this is ten times better. All natural.

He turns his head so that their lips meet, and once again the mood shifts in intensity. The kiss is rough, and their hands have sped up on one another and soon his hips are jerking into Tyler's fist, chasing it's firm hold, and shivers runs up and down his spine, and into his finger tips, and his vision is blinking out. Tyler pulls up again, and twists his wrist, and Jeremy comes intensely, his harsh "Fuck" swallowed by Tyler's soft mouth.

He wants to melt back into the sheets, but Tyler isn't finished yet, but he's close. Jeremy can feel him throbbing in his palm. He threads the fingertips of his free hand through Tyler's hair and pulls gently. "Hey," he says softly, and Tyler opens his eyes. Keeping eye contact, Jeremy pulls slowly but firmly. He wants to stretch his boyfriend's orgasm out for as long as possible. Tyler wants it faster, Jeremy can tell by the way he moves his hips so that his cock pushes deeper into Jeremy's fist, but Jeremy won't speed up.

At one point Tyler's eyes start to slide shut, but when he does Jeremy stops his hand. "Look at me," he'd whispered, and kissed him on the corner of the mouth.

Finally, Jeremy can feel that he's on the edge. He's swelling in Jeremy's hand, and his forearms, both on the bed now, are trembling. He allows Tyler to shut his eyes, and he pulls his head down to rest in the crook of his neck. Tyler's rough breaths hit his skin, and Jeremy turns his own head so that his lips are against Tyler's ear. He whispers, "Come on," at the same moment he twists his wrist, and Tyler releases a sharp breath and then another and then just like Jeremy, a sharp "Ah, fuck," and his hips jerk, one, twice, and Jeremy can feel his palm being coated by something warm and sticky. He milks Tyler gently, and Tyler lets out half a whine, before biting down on Jeremy's neck.

When his hips stop moving, Jeremy stops his stroking, but he keeps his hand wrapped around Tyler, and he scratches gently at the other boy's scalp. Long minutes pass in silence, and both their breathing goes back ot normal. Tyler hasn't moved much, except to bury his face further into Jeremy's neck, and move his hand up to cradle the boys face, tracing a thumb softly back and forth over his cheek. Soon the movement slows and stops and Jeremy thinks he's fallen asleep. He loves the way Tyler's full weight feels on top of him, comforting, and warm.

"You're not falling asleep on me are you?" He says this in a low voice, not pausing in his scratching.

Tyler shifts but doesn't get up. "Would that be a problem?" His voice is slightly muffled.

Jeremy runs his hand down the smooth skin of Tyler's neck and bare back, and feels a shiver run through the boy. "No." He lets his own eyes drift shut. "It's fine."


	7. 7

"Where were you, Jeremy?"

Jeremy looks away from his ceiling and to the doorway, to see Elena standing there in a tank top and pajama pants. He'd thought he'd slipped in noiselessly, but apparently he was wrong.

"Why are you still awake?" he asks and looks at the time. "It's two in the morning. Actually, better question; why isn't it Jenna in my doorway?" He takes his hands from behind his head and sits up. He hasn't changed out of his clothes yet, having chosen instead to flop down on top of the bedspread straight away.

"Because," Elena steps in and pushes the door so it's not quite closed, and makes her way over to sit on the end of his bed, one leg folded underneath her, "I was worried. And I covered for you. Why are you back so late?"

Jeremy shrugs. He doesn't want to tell Elena that he and Tyler have made up just yet. He wants to lay back down on his bed with his hands behind his head, and think about his day. He wants to close his eyes and remember how Tyler had looked at him through sleepy eyes, and how he'd kept giving him those side glances as he'd driven them to a place out of town to eat. Nowhere special, Tyler had said, just a small diner he used to go to with his dad when he was younger (although, Jeremy thinks it might be a little special; it seems to be one of the few good memories Tyler has of his father). He wants to think about how comfortable he'd felt with him, or about that certain smile Tyler gives him sometimes. The one that lights his eyes up and, for a second, makes him appear younger, childlike in it's sheer brilliance.

Jeremy wants to lay back and relive the way he'd felt waking up with one arm asleep, one shoe hanging off, and the scent and feel of Tyler surrounding him.

But Elena looks like she isn't leaving until she's reassured that he's alright. And he wants her to leave so he can lay back and stay in his bubble of happiness. Just for tonight.

"I was with Tyler," he says, hoping his relaxed tone will inspire the same in his sister.

No such luck.

Her eyes harden slightly, and her lip twists to the side. "Are you sure that's smart, Jere?"

He nods and moves to lay back down. "Mmmmmhmm." She waits but he doesn't say anymore. She opens her mouth to say something more, but he heads her off. "We talked about it. We're over it. We're guys remember. No drama."

Elena snorts at that. "Yeah, because you're so drama free." She says it teasingly, but it hits a small part somewhere inside of him.

He knows he's emotional.

He can't help it, and he hates dealing with it. His irrational emotions are the reason why he and Tyler ended up not talking for three days longer than needed. It was a small thing this time, but what about next time? What will happen the next time he overreacts? Tyler was okay with it this time, had let it go easily even though, despite his valid excuse, Jeremy still hadn't been understanding; but what about when Jeremy becomes too difficult to handle? What will happen when his mind continues to go on automatic and starts to insert false reasons and intentions into everything Tyler says? What if he starts over thinking, over analyzing?

He doesn't know why he's bothering to ask himself these questions. He knows what will happen; he'll leave. Tyler will leave, be gone, just like nearly everyone else Jeremy has cared about.

So much for his bubble of happiness.

He must have stayed silent for longer than he thought because he can see Elena's smile fade in the darkness of the room, and she says gently, "Hey, I was just kid-"

"It's okay. I'm just tired."

'Jere-"

"Elena. It's late. I just want to sleep." He closes his eyes, but he can sense her confusion at his abrupt change in mood. She doesn't move for a few moments, but Jeremy keeps his eyes closed and soon he feels the bed dip and rise as she gets up. He waits until he hears the door close behind her to open his eyes again.

He stares up at the ceiling bathed in moonlight. He'll just try harder, he decides. He'll try harder to think rationally, not to get too angry or annoyed. Jeremy finds himself a little surprised that this is the first time that he's actually had this thought. He's never felt the need to edit himself, to hold back, and he's not sure how he feels about having to do so with Tyler. Shouldn't it be the reverse? Shouldn't he feel like he can be himself the most when he's with him, more than anyone else?

And Tyler hasn't complained; he actually seems to enjoy when Jeremy is completely open, but Jeremy wants to be sure. He doesn't want to ruin this. He doesn't want to be susceptible to dramatic tendencies anymore. He's tired of being that guy.

Satisfied with his decision, Jeremy sits up to removes his shirt before laying back down. He adjusts himself to resemble how he'd lain in Tyler's bed that afternoon, and imagines he can feel the weight of the boy on top of him.

He closes his eyes again, and smiles to himself best he can through a yawn.

=..=..=

Tyler has shut the front door and is halfway to the stairs when he hears his uncle call for him from the parlor.

He throws his keys into the bowl near the doorway as he walks inside of the large, ornate room. "Yeah?" The minute he steps inside the hairs on the back of neck stands up. Ever since his uncle had rolled back into town, Tyler has gotten weird vibes from him. Every conversation they've had as of late, be it about sports or the 'Lockwood curse' (which seems to have way more meaning behind it than Mason is letting on), has been shrouded by a certain something that Tyler can never really pin point. All he knows for sure is that he edits himself around Mason. While his uncle probably thinks he's an idiot, Tyler knows enough to know that he can't be entirely trusted.

"You're back pretty late." Mason is standing next to what used to be his brother's desk. In his hand is an autographed baseball from some player Tyler's never heard of, but whom his father loved. He has a quick urge to tell Mason to put the ball back on it's stand, but he ignores it.

Instead, slightly confused at the statement, he looks over at the clock, and back at his uncle. "Yeah, I guess. It's two-thirty." After their impromptu nap, he and Jeremy had gotten cleaned up, and headed out to have dinner. Afterwards they'd driven around and ended up in the woods by the clearing near the lake, and they'd lost track of time.

"Your mother told me on weekends it's two."

Tyler laughs slightly, uncomfortably, still feeling uneasy. "That rule hasn't been followed since I was fifteen. It's no big deal." Mason doesn't say anything, just tosses the ball into the air repeatedly, and Tyler waits. "Did you stay up in here just to tell me that?" He doesn't receive an answer and his annoyance and unease mounts quickly. "Well, if that's all..." Tyler starts to turn away, but stops at the next words out of his uncle's mouth.

"What did Jeremy Gilbert want? Earlier, when he came over?"

Tyler forces his shoulders to relax, and he turns his head to the side when he answers. "Nothing, really. Just had to settle some things."

"Like what?"

Tyler turns around fully, and eyes Mason. He's still playing with the damn ball, throwing it up in the air lazily and catching it. "Just stuff." Tyler says carefully. The air in the room feels heavier, if that's even possible, and Tyler can feel himself tensing again. They both watch the ball go up and down for a few moments, until Mason breaks the silence, and Tyler's desperate hopes that he doesn't know anything are washed down the drain. "What would your father say? Or better yet, your mother? We both know _she's _not the most open minded person."

Tyler forces himself to blink slowly as he gathers his thoughts. He tries to stay relaxed and controlled, but it's not working. The tone of his uncle's voice to the untrained ear is congenial, but Tyler can hear something else. That taint of something he can't quite place, the same _thing_ he hasn't been able to identify even after spending a fair amount of time around Mason.

"Say about what?" he asks in a low voice.

Mason stops throwing the ball, and looks directly at Tyler. "Don't play stupid, Tyler. Maybe your boyfriend finds it cute, but I don't appreciate it."

Tyler's nostrils flare, and he wants to say he doesn't appreciate _this_. All these questions about his personal business, Mason sweeping into town and trying to mess with his life. Instead, he grits out through a tight jaw, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Mason stares at him blankly before letting out a humorless laugh. "Right." He draws the word out a bit and takes a few ambling steps forward. "Right, okay. Listen. I get it. I do. Experimentation and all that." His voice has changed; it's casual and he's speaking as if he's trying to be relatable, but it still sets Tyler's teeth on edge and cause his muscles to tense. "I never did it quite like that, but hey, everyone's got their things, their... _vices_." He sets the baseball down on the desk, next to the stand it rested on originally, and pushes the rolled cuffs of his sleeves further up his arms. "Just don't make a habit of it. Get it out of your system now."

Get it out of his system? Get _Jeremy_ out of his system? How do you get someone who's been running rampant in your veins before you even realized, out? Those are his first thoughts, but then he pushes them aside to concentrate on his anger. To have his confusion, actions, and decisions summed up in such a simple, cliched phrase makes Tyler's blood boil.

He wants to say Jeremy isn't some phase; that even though the odds are against them being 'together forever' and that they most likely will end this someday, he'll always be important. Tyler wants to say he isn't romanticizing anything, but he's not going to just throw Jeremy aside. But before he can, his uncle is speaking again. "Not that there's anything wrong with that lifestyle. It's just not for you." His eyes harden and he smiles in a way that makes Tyler want to punch him in his face, but all he can do is stand there, shell shocked. "But yeah," Mason walks forward now and claps him on the shoulder. "Get Jeremy out of your system, sooner rather than later, and let it go. Or... _I_ could always help to get rid of him." The threatening undertone to the last sentence makes Tyler's blood run cold. He thinks his uncle is going to walk around him now, but instead he makes sure their eyes are locked, and he squeezes Tyler's shoulder tightly, before he says in a voice that causes unpleasant chills to run up and down Tyler's spin, "Unless you want to find that moonstone. _Or_ give it to me, as I'm sure you've already found it and for _whatever_ reason haven't handed it over yet." His voice drops ever lower. "I would hate for your mother to find out about this, Tyler. About your _indiscretions," _he sneers around the word. "I mean, I doubt she could handle it. Who knows how she will react, what she might do. It just might break her heart."

And with that, he walks around his nephew and into the hallway, leaving Tyler to try and sift through all the threats, a dull ache running through his body, and a rushing in his ears.


	8. 8

**A/N: A little background never hurt anyone ;)**

**::::::**

The morning after he first let Jeremy Gilbert kiss him, Tyler is a nervous wreck.

He doesn't remember right away; he wakes up to an alarm he smacks away, he drifts between asleep and awake, and wonders why he's so damn tired in the first place. Then he recalls only getting two hours of sleep because he'd stayed up so late the night before. Sitting in that clearing with a bottle of booze and Gilbert.

_Jeremy_.

Tyler's eyes fly open at the rush of memories and images, and his heart immediately starts to pound in his chest.

What_-_

_Jeremy's face so close to his that Tyler can count his eyelashes._

He was drunk.

_The feel of Jeremy's soft mouth on his own, gently urging them to let him in._

He was drunk. They both were.

_The taste of Jeremy's mouth, surprisingly sweet, like he'd just had an apple or a peach._

Both Tyler's heart and stomach jump violently, and he sits up in bed quickly.

He was drunk. They were both drunk, and it didn't mean anything. It didn't matter. But even as he thinks this, his heart gives a strange twist. He ignores it.

Right, so, it meant nothing. Tyler nods to himself as he runs his hand though his hair - _Jeremy's hair tickling his cheekbones- _and he jumps out of bed to get ready for school.

He'll just walk in. Walk into school like nothing strange happened, like _nothing_ happened _at_ _all_, and everything will be fine. And if Gilbert brings it up, he'll push him aside; will say he has no idea what he's talking about because Tyler Lockwood is not gay. He's not.

He was drunk.

He jumps into the shower, and scrubs himself raw trying to resist the insane urge to punch the bathroom tiles. But it's hard when he can remember the feel of Jeremy's skin brushing against his, and the look in his eyes right before and right after they kissed. The curve of his mouth when it was turned up in a small relieved smile-

Tyler punches the bathroom wall, and lets out a sound of frustration. He barely winces when the hot water runs over his cut knuckles.

He gets dressed, barely noticing what he's pulling on until he realizes that the shirt he's pulled over his head is the same color Jeremy was wearing last night. He rips it off, and searches for another. Its when he goes to rifle through his dresser that he sees the bottle of whisky sitting on top of the wood.

The nearly full bottle.

He manages not to hurl it at the wall, but just barely.

Tyler sits heavily on the edge of his bed, plants his elbows on his knees, and buries his head in his hands. Maybe he should just stay home; fuck school for today, it's not like it's going anywhere. He scrubs at his face, and sighs deeply.

No. He's not going to hide. Nothing happened, and he's not going to hide form Jeremy Gilbert of all people for nothing. He stands again and finds a black polo shirt to throw on before he grabs his book bag and leaves his house.

He manages to act perfectly natural all day despite the fact that inside he's on pins and needles, expecting to see Jeremy's big frame moving through the hallways. Moving towards him.

But turns out Tyler didn't have to worry because Jeremy isn't there; not that day, or the next day, or the day after that, and by the fourth day Tyler is simultaneously relieved, curious, annoyed, and pissed.

Somehow, during the course of four days alone and ample amount of time to think, Tyler has convinced himself that Gilbert has no right to hide from him. _He's_ the one who started this. How dare he not finish it? And what if Tyler had felt something when they'd kissed? He hadn't of course, but what if he had? What then? Was he supposed to just sit and wait for Jeremy to show up one day and drop the bomb that it was all a mistake?

Because it wasn't; Tyler knows that now. The bottle was more full than empty and that means they were, for the most part, sober. Tyler tries hard not to acknowledge that this means he _let_ Jeremy Gilbert kiss him, but the notion is getting harder and harder to deny.

So when he finally sees Jeremy in the hallway in between fourth and fifth period on Thursday, Tyler has had it up to _here_ with his behavior.

He walks as quickly as he can towards where the other boy is rifling through his locker, (trying not to draw any curious stares with his hurried pace), and when he gets close enough, opens his mouth to say... Well he hasn't thought that far yet. But it doesn't matter that he doesn't know what he's going to say, because when Jeremy catches sight of him, his dark brown eyes light up, and that small smile tilts his lips, and Tyler's step stutters, and his heart gives a funny kind of thud.

It doesn't matter that Tyler doesn't know what he was going to say because the angry words would have died on his lips anyway.

And that's when Tyler Lockwood knows that he's fucked.

=.=

He ends up catching the cold that had Jeremy out for the better part of a week, but he finds himself not caring as much as he should. Especially when Jeremy stops by everyday after school to sit on the end of his bed and just talk to him, or touch his hand briefly and ask what happened to his knuckles.

=..=..=

"How did you feel when your parents died?"

Tyler doesn't look at Jeremy when he asks this. Just stares out into the rippling surface of the lake and waits for the answer.

Jeremy is quiet for such a long time that Tyler wonders if he's pissed him off, or made him so sad that he can't manage to speak, but he can't make himself move his head to look over and see. Finally, he hears Jeremy clear his throat.

"I felt devastated... and lost. And I felt really, _really,_ angry."

Tyler latches on to the last emotion. "Angry at what?"

"At everything." Jeremy's voice is quiet, but the undercurrent of past anger can still be heard, and Tyler feels a brief stab of guilt at asking Jeremy to relive this. But he has to know. "At everyone. At Elena, and my mom and dad. At the fucking bridge. At that night." He lets out a huff of air.

They stay silent for minutes, just the sound of the small waterfall soothing in the background.

"Is it bad that I only feel angry?" Tyler asks suddenly. "That I only feel lost because I never knew what he was building me up to be and he died before he could finish?" He inhales quickly and forces the words out. "That I don't feel devastated that he's gone? That if anything I feel kind of relived? Does that make me a bad person?"

Tyler can feel Jeremy's eyes on him, but he still doesn't turn around to meet his gaze. There's the soft noise of grass being displaced and he's sitting slightly closer to Tyler; the voice he uses is soft enough that it could have easily been carried away if a slight breeze decided to blow. "No."

Tyler lets his eyes fall shut for a moment as he feels a little of the weight on his heart and shoulders lift.

=..=..=

"What are we doing?"

Tyler asks this one evening as they lay on Jeremy's bed watching the color shift from yellow to orange on the ceiling as the sun sets. Soon it'll be dark and the knowledge that he'll be laying in the darkness with a guy he feels... _something_ for prompts him to ask the question.

"Watching the sun set?" Jeremy says half jokingly.

Tyler turns his head away from the high ceiling, and looks out of the window. "You know what I mean," his voice is quiet and serious, and he can feel Jeremy sober up next to him.

His voice is just as quiet when he answers. "I don't know. But... it doesn't matter. It doesn't have to right now." he pauses. "It just ours, no one knows. We don't have to figure it out yet."

The room completes its transition to darkness as Jeremy's words play in his mind.

_Ours_.

It was theirs.

And his. Jeremy is _his_.

A burst of something light, and airy, and wonderful flits through Tyler's body at the thought, and he tentatively moves the hand that has been laying so close to Jeremy's. The first brush of skin is hesitant, but when Jeremy's fingers move slightly, but stay where they are, Tyler feels braver. He runs his fingers lightly over the inside of Jeremy's arm and marvels at how soft his skin is; he feels him shiver at his touch and Tyler can't stop the smirk that graces his face.

He moves his hand down so that he can stroke the inside of Jeremy's wrist with his thumb. This time Jeremy lets out a small sound of contentment that sends another wave of feeling rushing through Tyler; this time its so warm and _satisfied _that for a brief second his heart flips.

His smirk falls into a small smile, and he turns his head to look at Jeremy's profile in the dark.

=..=..=

"How long have you been wanting to kiss me?" Tyler watches as Jeremy's cheeks flush slightly at the question. They haven't brought it up since it happened a little over a month ago, but it's been there. Hovering. When the air gets too still and their faces too close.

They still haven't kissed again.

Jeremy tries to shrug nonchalantly, but the red stain on his face makes it less than convincing. Tyler smirks and Jeremy gets a fire in his eyes.

"Why did you let me kiss you?"

Tyler doesn't answer, and ignores the slight heat stealing across his own face, opting instead to use his controller to gesture towards the television screen and grunting, "Pick your team already."

=..=..=

The second time they kiss, Jeremy is laughing over something Tyler has just said; he can't remember what it is, but he does remember the way Jeremy's eyes crinkled at the sides, and how his mouth looked so wonderful, pulled into a big smile.

Before he can tell himself no, Tyler has put his hand on the nape of Jeremy's neck and is pulling him forward, and their lips are pressed together, and he can feel Jeremy's smile get wider before he slips his fingers into Tyler's hair and kisses back.

=..=..=

Tyler is getting tackled by a team member during a practice when he realizes that the reason why he didn't get out of the way in time is because he was too busy thinking about seeing Jeremy in a few hours. As he lays on the grass, watching the clouds pass by, panting heavily and his body aching, he realizes for the second time, in less than two months, that he's completely fucked when it comes to Jeremy Gilbert.

=..=..=

"You never told me what happened to Anna."

Jeremy's head whips up from his textbook and an odd expression flits over his face. Tyler eyes him and wonders if he's said something wrong. Tyler knows how broken up Jeremy seemed to be after Anna was gone. He remembers because it was right around the time his father died, and he recalls thinking that Jeremy looked more upset about his girlfriend moving away than he did about his father biting the dust. "Jere?"

The expression passes and Jeremy looks down at his book again. "It... just didn't work out. Her mom was moving and she went with her." His voice is tight and controlled, and his eyes aren't moving as he stares at the page.

Tyler doesn't think that this is the whole story, but he leaves it alone anyway.

=..=..=

Their friends and Jeremy's family (Tyler's own mother is more out of the picture now than she was before) notice the shift in his and Jeremy's relationship, and ask a couple questions - "why the sudden change?" "is this some sort of weird joke" - and make a few comments - "you'll be beating each other senseless again," "finally. All the fighting was getting old" - but all in all, it's no big deal. Everyone seems to have their own things to deal with lately, which Tyler is more than grateful for.

=..=..=

The first time Tyler feels Jeremy's large, warm, hand wrap around his cock they're in the backseat of his car, and he lets out a whine that is easily swallowed by Jeremy's mouth. They've been touchy feely lately; it's getting harder and harder to keep their hands off one another. But every time they'd get carried away, be so close to doing what they both want so badly, one boy would pull away, the confusion as to what _exactly_ is going on between them clear in his eyes.

But this time, when Jeremy cautiously puts his hand on Tyler's knee and moves it up slightly every few seconds, as Tyler drives them home, he can't take it anymore.

He makes a few turns, ends up parking near a part of the forest few wander into, and pulls Jeremy to him so fiercely, their teeth clack against each other and Jeremy lets out a muffled moan, before responding enthusiastically. Somehow, they make it to the back seat, and Tyler only notices because when he comes up briefly for air he realizes that the stick shift is no longer pressing into the side of his thigh.

Hands fumble against hands, and fingers get tangled, but when he felt Jeremy wrap his hand around him, all Tyler can think is that he is in heaven. He only comes down long enough to force his hand down Jeremy's jeans and wrap his own fingers around that hard, hot, velvety soft part of him.

Jeremy rips his mouth from Tyler's and his hips snap forward automatically as he buries his face into Tyler's neck. He lets out a sound so deep and breathy it causes Tyler's pulse to quicken even more, and he throbs in Jeremy's grip.

Its fast, and hard, and sweaty, and when Jeremy cups Tyler's jaw with one hand, and bites into his neck to muffle his cries as comes thickly in Tyler's hand, Tyler follows immediately. Their breathing is harsh and takes a while to level out. He feels so fucking _good, _with Jeremy's weight on him, and the fingers of his free hand are threaded through Jeremy's hair; all he can acknowledge is the bliss running through his veins, and the fogged windows, the latter of which he laughs at weakly before closing his eyes briefly. Eventually, he only ends up moving because his angle in the backseat is starting to make his back ache.

The goodbye kiss Jeremy gives him right outside of his house makes Tyler grin and not give a fuck about who could have seen.

=..=..=

"Do you ever think about Vicki?"

"Sometimes. You."

"Yeah... but probably for a different reason than you do."

Jeremy doesn't elaborate, and Tyler doesn't ask him to. He's got that same look in his eyes that he had when Tyler mentioned Anna.

=..=..=

The first time Jeremy asks Tyler to stay the night starts out like any normal evening. They've done some talking, some homework, and fooling around (which Tyler just can't get enough of, really.) Tyler throws his book bag over one shoulder and is halfway to the door when Jeremy blurts out "You don't have to go. I mean, it's pretty late, and if you don't want to drive... you could stay."

Tyler turns back around to see Jeremy's eyes fixed on his face. His expression seems calm at first glance, but Tyler can see traces of worry, as if he expects Tyler to make a joke, or laugh at him.

"I don't know," Tyler says, slowly. "I'm sure my uncle is probably waiting around for me." Tyler isn't one to really try and get home on time, but there's something about his uncle that makes Tyler want to be extra cautious when he's involved.

"Right." Jeremy looks down at his books, and starts to close them. "No problem. Next time."

Tyler can't help but smile a little at Jeremy as he watches him try to act nonchalant, and that odd warmth spreads through his body again. He thinks for maybe a second before letting the book bag slide off of his shoulder. "But I'm sure it'll be fine."

Jeremy pauses for a moment, but starts gathering books again, avoiding Tyler's gaze. "Are you sure?"

Tyler's smile widens."Yeah, I'm sure."

Jeremy deposits the books on his desk before he turns back to Tyler. "Alright, my clothes are in that dresser. Just take whatever you want. You know where the bathroom is. I'll just go tell Jenna..." He stops his rambling as their eyes linger on each other for a bit too long and finally Jeremy breaks eye contact with a small smile before he brushes past Tyler, to head downstairs to the kitchen.

=..=..=

"I tried to kill myself. After Anna was gone."

Tyler doesn't know why that surprises him as much as it does. Ever since his parents died it's been obvious that Jeremy's been depressed. He'd gotten better for a while, when he started dating Anna, but after she left it seemed as if he'd gotten worse than before.

Tyler supposes what he's actually surprised at the fact that Jeremy chose to tell him at all, let alone in The Grill where anyone could overhear. But Jeremy either doesn't seem to notice, or just doesn't care.

"How?"

"Pills."

"Why?"

"Because," Jeremy fixes his gaze at some unknown spot, and Tyler knows that he's not really looking at anything, but going over the words in his head. He clears his throat, "Because everyone I care about dies... or goes away. It's like everyone I touch disappears, or something bad happens to them, or..." He stops talking and sighs, before looking down at the salt shaker resting in front of them. He lets out a small self-depreciating laugh. "I'm surprised no one has caught on yet; realized that if I care about them the best thing they could do for themselves is stay away."

Tyler doesn't know what to say, but his throat feels tight for a moment before he clears it; he hopes that he's not being presumptuous when he stretches his leg out to press against Jeremy's, trying to tell him without words that he's not going anywhere.

The look in Jeremy's eyes when they flit up to look at Tyler's face, along with the small smile barely visible on his lips. assures him that he's not.

=..=..=

The first time they have sex Tyler is terrified.

He doesn't let on of course; the first thing all Lockwood men learn is to never show fear. Fear is equal to weakness. But Tyler does feel weak – in his knees, in his fluttering chest.

All night the air has carried a mood of difference; something is going to happen, they both know it. They've been quieter as they study on Jeremy's bed; the only kiss they've shared today lingered and Jeremy bumped his nose gently against Tyler's before pulling away. And when Jeremy quietly asks him if he's staying tonight, Tyler just nods.

His heart leaps into his throat when he locks the bedroom door behind him and looks up to see Jeremy settling down on top of the covers in only his navy blue boxer shorts. To hide the sudden rush of heat in his face (which is ridiculous - he's seen Jeremy in nothing but his boxers plenty of times before) he runs the towel roughly through his damp hair, making sure the fabric covers most of his face.

When he finally thinks enough of his blush has disappeared, he throws the towel over a chair, and looks back at Jeremy. He's reclined into the pillows, with his hands behind his head and his eyes fixed on Tyler's body; he didn't bother with anything but a pair of boxers either – it's a warm night.

The pure hunger in Jeremy's eyes causes goosebumps to erupt all over Tyler's skin, and a shiver to run down his spine. To cover it up he gives a cocky smirk, and says jokingly, "like what you see?"

Jeremy's eyes run the length of his body once more. "Yeah," his voice is quiet and intense, and sends a stronger shiver coursing through Tyler's body. He wets his bottom lip, slightly. "Yeah, I do."

The smirk slips slightly at Jeremy's tone, and that's when the 'weak in the knees' part of the situation makes itself known.

There's no reason for him to still be standing, so Tyler pulls the metal string to turn off Jeremy's desk lamp, and the room is dark suddenly except for the light of the waxing moon that filters in. As Tyler moves onto the bed his heart is pounding, but he doesn't have that much time to think about it, because before he knows it, Jeremy's lips are on his, coaxing and intoxicating, and he can feel hands all over his chest, and his own hands are on Jeremy's strong back. There is silence, except for the sound of smooth skin sliding against smooth skin, soft murmurs of encouragement, and sighs of satisfaction.

Everything is going fine until Tyler has Jeremy naked and glorious on his back, and he doesn't know what to do. As he kneels on the bed between Jeremy's legs, his panic floods back and he freezes as he looks down, panting, at the beautiful sight of moonlight streaming over the boy's chest.

What does he do now? He doesn't want to hurt him, he's never done this with a guy before. His heart pounds and he feels like an idiot.

His utter loss of what to do in this situation must show on his face, because Jeremy gives a little smile and smooths his hand up Tyler's chest to wrap his fingers around the back of his neck, and pull him down gently. He kisses him softly and smiles against his lips.

"It's okay," he whispers. "It's fine. Just..." He shifts a bit and his hand reaches for something on the nightstand that Tyler hasn't noticed. Jeremy's arm is back and he presses a small bottle into Tyler's hand. "Just... be gentle. You won't hurt me." Tyler buries his face into Jeremy's neck and inhales; the clean smell of shampoo, and soap, and something so inherently _Jeremy_ floods his senses, and it triggers both a sense of calm and excitement inside of him.

As he slips a slick finger into Jeremy, Tyler watches his face closely through heavily lidded eyes. He's feeling more confident now, even more so when he slips another finger in at a certain angle and Jeremy gives a sharp intake of breath and a muttered curse. He tries for the angle again, and after a few more pumps finds it. Jeremy moves his hips down to meet his fingers and his hands tighten on Tyler's shoulders.

Slipping a third finger inside causes a small wince of pain, but Tyler soothes it quickly by finding that spot and massaging it. He's breathing just as heavily as the boy underneath him now, and his lips hover over Jeremy's; he's fascinated by what he sees on Jeremy's face. If he presses on that bundle of nerves gently, Jeremy's breath hitches and his eyelids flutter; harder and he squeezes his eyes shut and bites his bottom lip. But Tyler likes the reaction he gets when he taps on that small part of him the most– when he does, Jeremy's eyes roll to the back of his head and his breathing becomes so labored Tyler is surprised he isn't shouting at how good he feels. At how good _Tyler_ is making him feel. Another surge of power goes through him at the thought, and he throbs.

He stops tapping, and goes back to pumping his fingers in and out slowly. Jeremy's chest is heaving and Tyler smiles deviously against his lips. The glare Jeremy shoots him isn't so effective with mused hair and flushed cheeks. He tightens around Tyler's fingers, and suddenly he can imagine that hot slick hold gripping his cock and the smile is gone, replaced by a determined set of his lips.

He slips his fingers out of Jeremy and his own heavy cock jumps at the sound of displeasure that slips from the boys lips. He finds the small bottle on the bedspread and pours some of the slick liquid into the palm of his hand, slicking himself up quickly before he settles over Jeremy again. The glare is gone; instead he looks a little nervous and Tyler doesn't want that. For some reason the need to have Jeremy feel as safe and comfortable as he possibly can overrides everything else, and Tyler cradles Jeremy's cheek and kisses him deeply as he pushes slowly inside.

There is a muffled moan and Jeremy's back arches, but Tyler keeps his mind off of the temporary discomfort by nipping at his lips and sucking gently on his tongue.

Being inside of Jeremy feels... amazing. Perfect. More than Tyler has ever imagined, could ever imagine. It takes all his might not move right away, instead he waits until Jeremy has adjusted. There are a few moments of stillness in which Tyler squeezes his eyes shut, takes deep breaths, and rests his forehead against Jeremy's while praying for self control. Finally, _finally, _Jeremy moves his hips up, urging Tyler to move and he lets out his held breath against Jeremy's skin and does.

It feels like being gripped by hot silk; every stroke is quickly pushing Tyler to the edge. _Too_ quickly, but he can't stop moving; every one of his thrusts are met by Jeremy's hips and the sounds Jeremy is making, _God, _Tyler has _never _heard anything so fucking sexy in his life.

He's not going to last as long as he wants to (it feels too fucking good), but he can't come before Jeremy – he wants to see him fall apart before he does. He takes ahold of Jeremy's heavy cock and strokes it. Softly at first, but, at the insistent movements of the other boy's hips, his tugs become more and more rough. The hot pulsing of Jeremy around Tyler's dick is driving him crazy and he _needs _Jeremy to finish, needs to see him let go-

He angles his hips, and pushes in; he twists his fist, and Jeremy lets out a shout, half of which is swallowed by Tyler's mouth, trapped by a tongue against his, and he comes hard. He arches so he's flush against hot skin, and he grips Tyler's hair tightly, and the pain pushes him over the edge ,and Tyler is coming too, emptying into that tight heat so hard and quick that he gets light headed and feels the room spin.

He pulls his lips from Jeremy's – he needs to air. He takes a deep breath, and the room stops spinning, but the light headed feeling prevails. He collapses on top of Jeremy's broad chest and buries his face into his neck again. Jeremy tightens around his softening cock again three or four times quickly, milking him, and the muffled "Fuck!" causes Jeremy to give a breathy laugh, and Tyler knows it's pay back for his teasing earlier.

They don't move for a long while, except for Tyler shifting so only half his body covers Jeremy's. When he does this, he slips out of him, and they both make small sounds of discontent.

Tyler wonders idly if he should move to the other side of the bed fully and give Jeremy his space, but he's too tired to move a muscle. Also, when he feels Jeremy's tentative touch to his hair, the long fingers softly carding through, Tyler assumes he's being asked to stay put.

At least for now.


	9. 9

"So are you going to give it to him?"

They are both staring at the moonstone laying between them. It is bright against the dark navy of Jeremy's blankets and it might just be Tyler's imagination, but it seems like there is a faint glow emitting from it, originating from the inside out.

"I don't know."

It's been a few hours but Tyler's head is still reeling. He'd gone straight to his room after his and Mason's little "chat" but he didn't sleep at all. He'd lain in bed, staring at the ceiling, resisting the urge to pull out the moonstone from it's hiding place and stare at that instead. He knew that it was ridiculous, knew that his uncle couldn't see through walls, but suddenly Tyler had felt as if he were being watched. The minute the sun had come up, he was up and out the door, moonstone in pocket. "I don't _really _have a good reason not to give it to him, except that I don't _want _to." He raises his eyes to meet Jeremy's. "I mean, it's just a rock. What could he possibly do with it?"

Jeremy allows his eyes to fall back onto the moonstone, but not because he needs to study it again. He wants to avoid Tyler's gaze; his own eyes have a habit of giving everything away. He wants to tell him that he doesn't think that the moonstone is just a rock and that, more than likely, it's anything but. One thing Jeremy has learned recently is that no object that someone wants this badly in Mystic Falls could possibly be innocuous.

But he can't tell Tyler that, because then he'd have to explain how he knows this. He'd have to explain all about vampires and risk sounding crazy. He'd have to tell him about Stefan, and Damon, and Anna, and... and Vicki. And in the end, it would all come down to the same conclusion: he would be putting Tyler at risk. Putting Tyler in a bad position caused by knowing too much, because even though he hates not telling him what's going on, the fact of the matter is Jeremy is already in danger because he knows so much. Jeremy hated being in the dark about things, but some days he wishes that he was still oblivious to all that was going on around on around him, and that he still thought those maulings _were_ actually animal attacks.

He can't tell him...

Or can he?

It would be beyond wonderful to have someone to talk to about this stuff. Someone who isn't Elena, who he can't really talk to anyway because she's hell bent on protecting him and refuses to tell anything. And he gets her reasons, but still... it would be a relief...

He looks back up at Tyler to see him still staring at him. He looks so tired; his hair is disheveled, and he's wearing the same clothes as yesterday. Jeremy sighs. He can't do that to Tyler; he can't tell him about everything that's going on right around him. That answer would only lead to more questions, and the need to find more answers. More stress.

"I just think..." He pauses "I don't think you should give it up."

"Why not?" Tyler is starting to sound agitated and Jeremy tries not to take offense; it's understandable.

"Just," Jeremy shifts in his position and sighs again. "It _can't_ just be a rock, Ty. Who threatens someone for a rock? Are you sure he didn't say anything else? About why he wanted it?"

Tyler shakes his head and looks back down at the bed. It's his turn to look away now, because he didn't tell Jeremy everything. He didn't say that Mason essentially threatened Jeremy. _Offered to get rid of him._ A small unpleasant shiver still prickles across his skin when he thinks this. All Jeremy knows is that Mason demanded the stone and threatened to tell his mother that he was... whatever he was. Besides, Tyler doesn't see the point in telling Jeremy anyway; it would just cause unnecessary worry.

He looks back up to see Jeremy's slightly bowed head. He already looks worried, a little too worried actually, and Tyler wonders why. Yeah, his mom might find out, but in the end that's his problem not Jeremy's. The level of discontent in his expression does not fit the situation. He pushes this thought to the side to examine later.

"But what else can I do?" he asks. "Just keep it, and wait for him to go through with what he said, and have my mother hate me? Wait for him to go after y-" He stops abruptly, but not abruptly enough.

"Go after who? Me?" Jeremy is more alert now, his eyes narrow in confusion, and the worried lines on his face deepen. "What, did he say he was going to come after _me?" _

"No," Tyler denies, but it's no use.

"He did, didn't he?" Tyler goes to say no again, but Jeremy cuts him off. "And don't lie to me. You've got that same look on your face when I asked about what happened to your knuckles."

Tyler feels his face flush. "Me and Dick-"

"Got into a fight, I know." He lets out a scoff. "Funny, I saw Dick before he left; he didn't have a mark on him. But that doesn't matter right now." He leans forward. "Listen, Tyler, you can't give him that moonstone."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because he's threatened to destroy your life, and he said he was going to come after me! That's something serious!"

"And that's why I don't want anything to do with this!" Their voices have raised without their noticing, and Tyler's last proclamation hangs heavily in the air. He sighs and scrubs at his face. "It's not worth it, whatever it is."

Jeremy bites his tongue. He _knows _that this moonstone can only be bad news, and he tries again. "Tyler-"

"Why are you so against this, Jere? Do you know something I don't? Do you know what this is, what it does?"

Jeremy lets out a sharp exhale through his nose and looks to the side. He can't tell him, he can't... "No," he looks back at Tyler. "No, I don't know what it does." He skates over the first part of the question. "I just know I don't want him to have it." Because Jeremy has no doubt in his mind that this, some how, some way, has something to do with vampires, and despite knowing a few who are okay (and Damon) he knows that, in general, this isn't a good thing.

"Yeah, well, I'm the one who has it." Tyler looks back down at the deceptively innocent looking stone, and Jeremy watches him.

He knows that he's not going to get anymore from Tyler right now; he knows the other boy well enough to recognize the set jaw and tense shoulders for what they are. Jeremy sighs.

"Did you sleep last night?"

The non sequitur makes Tyler look up at Jeremy again, his features arranged in a slightly confused expression that Jeremy can't help but find endearing. He picks up the moonstone, shifts further up the bed so he's sitting beside Tyler, their chests facing each other, and presses the smooth rock into his boyfriend's hand. "I asked if you got any sleep last night. You look tired."

Tyler stares down at the rock in his hand, already distracted again by thoughts of what it could be and why Mason wants it so badly.

"Hey," Jeremy says softly, trying to get Tyler's attention, but when this doesn't seem to work, he raises a hand to cup the side of Tyler's neck, urging him to look in his direction. "You need to go to sleep," he says when their eyes meet. Tyler's eyes try to stray back to his hand but Jeremy runs his fingertips through the short hair on the back of Tyler's neck, and the other boy's eyelids flutter and slide shut. "You can't think about this anymore, not right now when you're so exhausted." He continues to play with Tyler's hair, as it seems the only way to keep his attention off the moonstone. "You can sleep here. You can stay the whole day, and we can relax and then we can talk about this again. Okay?" He knows Elena will probably have something to say about this (she's still wary), but Jeremy couldn't care less. Besides, it is the perfect staying in weather: grey and windy.

Tyler nods and lets out a deep breath. Eyes still closed he leans forward and presses a kiss to Jeremy's lips. Its brief and closed mouthed, but it still sends a thrill through Jeremy's body, and makes his heart jump. He resists following when Tyler pulls away and looks down at the rock one more time. Sighing, he sets it on the night stand, mumbles something about taking a shower, and gets up.

As Jeremy quietly watches him move around the room and gather clothes from the drawer, he can't help but think that he could get used to the sight, the image of them sharing a space. He imagines them _really_ sharing a bed one day, sharing an apartment, and he allows a small upwards curve of his lips to form a little smile at Tyler when he slips out of the bedroom.

He slides down into the pillows and his eyes stray to the iridescent stone resting on top of oak. He raises his hand to pick it up, but hesitates. _Stop being stupid. _His hand hovers for a few more seconds before he closes the length, and picks it up. It's heavy and cool and shaped like a tear drop. He turns it from side to side, not really sure what he's looking for. Minutes pass in near silence, save for the sound of the wind in the leaves and Elena or Jenna moving about the house. It's still early, a little after nine a.m. and Jeremy doesn't doubt they both have plans for the day. Elena for sure.

She's always involved in something... always knows what's going on... An idea hovers around the edges of his mind, but it takes him a few minutes to debate it and come to a conclusion. He gives the stone one more long look and sets it down, mind made up. Before Tyler leaves, Jeremy will convince him to keep a hold of the moonstone for a little longer, and tonight he'll get Elena alone and talk to her. And more importantly, make her talk to him.


	10. 10

Tyler shuts the front door quietly behind him and immediately hates the fact that he feels the need to. This is _his _house; he shouldn't have to sneak around, shouldn't have to feel threatened at the prospect of running into anyone in here that would cause him harm, especially with his father gone. But he does, and it makes his temper flare despite the fact that his day has been relatively relaxing. His nerves are soothed momentarily as he recalls waking up sometime in the afternoon to Jeremy's warm lips against his throat and hand sliding softly across his stomach.

He'd said he would keep the moonstone away from Mason for a little while longer as he slipped out into the light rain, but they both knew that it was a half-hearted promise. He doesn't want to hold onto it anymore.

He's walking carefully across the foyer in hopes of making his way up the stairs and slipping into his room unnoticed when he hears familiar voices. They float across the gleaming empty space, and as Tyler moves closer to them he realizes that they are coming from the same room as last night. He keeps his footsteps as light as he can, and this time he doesn't enter but stands out of sight near the door frame, brow furrowing automatically as he listens in.

"-can't get it."

_Elena?_

It doesn't seem likely, but now that he is closer Tyler recognizes the voice he hears as hers. He should know; they grew up together, but... _what is Elena doing here?_ What could she possibly need to talk to Mason about? He wants to look around the corner, but won't risk being seen. He doesn't really know how, but he knows that it's best for him to stay out of sight.

"I can get it," he hears his uncle say. His voice has a slightly desperate undertone to it, something Tyler has never heard coming from him and he shifts, body inadvertently trying to get closer to conversation. "He knows I know now. He'll give it to me, eventually."

"_Eventually_ isn't good enough, Mason." That is definitely Elena. But it doesn't _sound _like her. Elena's voice has never been that hard.

"I threatened him. I didn't want..." Mason clears his throat, but Tyler has already caught the pained shade to his words. "Just give it a little more time-"

"I don't _have _time." The ice in her voice melts, but the seductive tone that slides into it's place doesn't seem organic, either. "Now, if you just let me Compel him..."

"No." Mason is firm. "No, he doesn't need to be. You can't anyway."

"Oh, but I can." The lowness of her voice makes Tyler want to shiver, but not because it's alluring; she sounds as if she's a hunter who's known nothing but success. "It doesn't work on you, but he's not been turned yet-"

"And he won't be." Mason says sharply.

The seductiveness drops and the steel is back, words clipped. "You're right. He won't. Especially if we get moonstone."

Mason is quiet. The silence stretches, and Tyler's muscles feel tight from standing so still, and he thinks he can feel the topic of discussion weighing him down, burning in his pocket.

"You can't Compel him." Mason says. "It doesn't work that way, and you know it. It has to be given willingly; _I _have to give it to you. You _need_ m-"

Tyler jumps violently at the sudden crash and a grunt, and when he hears Elena's voice over the blood rushing in his ears it's so close he figures they must be up against the wall. _Which makes no sense because by the sound of it they were all the way across the room seconds ago_. "No," Elena's voice is pure venom, more frightening for its calmness. "What I _need _is for you to do as your told. Make no mistake, get the moonstone or I will Compel him to give it to you before I _snap his neck." _There's another bang, this one just as close to Tyler's face, making the pictures rattle on the walls and he hears Mason make an injured noise. Her voice is softer when she tells him "I don't want either one of us to suffer, despite what you may think. I want to help you, but you have to help me. I want this curse broken, to be with you..." A soft rustling his heard now and a sigh. There is the unmistakable sound of a kiss and something murmured which sounds like, "Just get it, Mason."

_What the fuck? _Tyler's heart is racing and he fumbles in his pocket to grab ahold of the stone, surprised that it's still cool to the touch. It shines in the light of the foyer, the purples and greens and blues creating a pattern that swirls and makes Tyler's head hurt from just looking at it. He knows that Jeremy asked him not to, but he doesn't want this anymore, doesn't want to hold onto this anymore, be responsible or put in the middle of _any_ of this-

He grits his teeth and braces himself before stepping into the room. His eyes first find the overturned desk, papers scattered everywhere, the frame of family photo cracked. He whips his head around to the wall where Mason is standing alone, to the billowing curtains around the open terrace doors, and back to Mason. Tyler turns quickly, confused. He knows- he _heard _Elena in here. But the room is empty except for him and Mason who is rubbing at his neck and breathing hard. Tyler's foot hits something, he thinks its the baseball because he feels it roll away, but he doesn't look down to see because the noise has made Mason's eyes snap up to his.

Tyler takes an involuntarily step back. Something flickers in Mason's eyes, an emotion close to regret, and he takes a careful step forward.

"Tyler, what-"

"What the fuck is going on?" Mason's jaw clenches but doesn't answer, and Tyler feels his temper flare higher. "Tell me what the hell is going on. Why was Elena here?"

"Did you see any of that?"

"What, no?" Tyler doesn't want to answer any questions. He wants _his_ questions answered. "But I heard most of it."

"That wasn't Elena. It was my friend Katherine."

"I don't care!" Tyler shouts; he doubts it was a 'friend' but he doesn't want to know who that person was. Well, he does want to know, but it's not his main focus. He wants to know _what _they were talking about.

Mason looks away from him, and Tyler's hand tightens around the stone. He fights to keep his voice steady. "You want this?" Mason's eyes dart back to Tyler and then to his hand where the iridescent stone peaks from his fist. Of course he wants it, Tyler can _feel_ how much he does, sees it in the way he straightens up and his eyes gleam. He gestures with his full hand. "You want this - you're going to tell me everything."

Mason's expression shifts to one of wariness and his voice sounds like it wants to bargain. "Tyler-"

"Everything."

They stand there, Tyler's heart still pounding in his chest, eyes taking in Mason's rumpled clothing and quickly resigning expression. When Mason finally nods, the look on his face makes Tyler want to reconsider his demand.

=..=..=

"A werewolf?" Jeremy figures he should be more shocked but as he meets Elena's gaze in the bathroom mirror all he can muster up initially is mild surprise. But really, why should he react strongly? He knows about _vampires _of all things -dated one even. _And now you're dating a werewolf. _

"Not a werewolf," Elena says as if she can hear his thoughts. "Mason Lockwood is the werewolf, but Tyler isn't."

"But he carries the gene."

"He carries the gene."

Neither of them say anything. The minutes stretch until Elena turns around to face him directly. "Are you going to be okay?"

"How is the gene triggered? Can it be?" He doesn't answer her question because he's not sure yet how he feels. _Is there a right way to feel? _

Her eyes are troubled when they sweep over his face. "We don't know yet. I mean, there's nothing in the books we've read...or notes... Damon has theories..." She trails off.

_Theories, _he thinks._ Damon has theories about Tyler. Tyler._ His Tyler.

There is another lengthy pause in the face of Jeremy's silence. "Are you going to be alright?"

He ignores her question again. "Is Tyler going to be alright?"

"I- I don't know. He should be," she looks unsure. "I mean, we don't know exactly-"

"No, I mean his uncle. Mason. He threatened him." More unease begins to fill him.

"Why?"

"He threatened him for something."

"What?" Elena looks confused and alarmed. "For what?"

"A moonstone?" He says it like a question, hoping to get an answer, to see Elena's eyes light up in recognition, but they don't. Instead, the cloud of confusion gets heavier.

"Moonstone? What is that, what does it do?"

"I don't know, I was hoping you did." The feeling of being helpless washes over him suddenly. No one knows what's going on. He can tell from his sister's expression. _No one in this fucking town as a clue-_

"I've never heard of it, but I could ask Stefan about it."

Jeremy nods, but isn't really listening; what is going on at the Lockwood's right now? Is it safe for Tyler to be home? _Yes, _his brain immediately answers. _If Mason were going to hurt him he would have done it already. But that was before he warned Tyler... before he threatened him... and I asked him not to give him the stone. How dangerous is he?_

"They- he only transforms on a full moon, or what?" His voice sounds urgent to his ears, but he doesn't have a clue where he needs to be or what to do.

"Pretty much. Look, Jere," she hesitates "I know that this is all weird and a little scary but you cannot tell Tyler that you know this."

"What?" Disbelief and annoyance rolls through him. "How can I not tell him about this?"

"Because," she says carefully, "he might tell Mason. And Mason _can't _know that we know, especially that Damon and Stefan know."

"Why not?"

She hesitates again. "Because... a bite from a werewolf can... it can kill a vampire, and if he finds out that Damon and Stefan know he'll connect the dots and..."

"So Tyler could kill them?"

"No. Well right now he can't, but if he were to change-"

"But I can't keep him in the dark about this, Elena. What if he does whatever he needs to do to trigger this thing and I could have prevented it?"

"But we don't know what it _is_ yet Jeremy." She's imploring. "We don't know anything and to bring it up will just make everything more confusing." He opens his mouth to speak again but she continues. "Please, Jeremy. Don't say anything. Once we find out what triggers the curse we can talk about what to do then, but saying anything now will just make everything worse." She eyes him warily. "He wouldn't believe you anyway, would he? I mean, unless, have you..."

He gets what she's hinting at, and rolls his eyes. "Don't worry. I haven't told him about vampires. I don't want him to think I'm crazy." Like that even matters anymore, really, because when everything gets out he's sure everyone will think they've gone insane – or that this was one big nightmare.

Elena looks relieved but she still sounds worried when she asks, "So you won't say anything?"

Jeremy does _not _want to keep this a secret from Tyler, and frankly he doesn't know how he possibly can. This isn't like before when all the contact they had was either a toss up between a punch to the face or a tentative conversation that never really became civil. He can't imagine sitting down on his bed, or at the Grill, or in the woods and looking into Tyler's eyes and not telling him about this... this _thing_ that could change his life and probably will. The inner struggle pulls at his chest, and it's the thought that Tyler won't believe him anyway that makes him say, "Fine." He looks her straight in the eye. "But the minute you find out what triggers this thing you tell me, Elena."

She nods quickly and silence falls again. His head is spinning and a pressure is building between his eyes. Why is everything so complicated? Why does he attract these kinds of things? Has he ever dated someone who was ever always human? _Died human?_ Jeremy doesn't think so. _It's Vicki and Anna all over again_. _God, _Tyler is a fucking werewolf or he carries the gene that could trigger at any moment. He could _kill _people, he could _kill _vampires. _Or he can be killed..._

Jeremy can't handle this right now.

He turns to head back into his room.

Elena tries again. "Are you going to be oka-"

"No." He shuts the door behind him.


	11. 11

For the second night a row Tyler doesn't sleep and he can't foresee a time in the near future when he will.

As he'd listened to Mason weave some insane tale about werewolves, and full moons and how he himself, Tyler, was tied into all of this, his mind had been spinning, but now it's at a standstill.

Focused.

He hasn't moved from his spot on the bed since he'd fallen into it about ten hours ago. He hadn't moved when he heard his mother wake up and get ready for the day, hadn't moved when she knocked on his door softly, and asked if he wasn't going to school today. Hadn't corrected her when she came in and sat on the edge of his bed, waxing poetic about missing his father too, and that she understood if he needed a day off.

He hadn't seen his uncle since he'd handed over the stone, leaving the office in a daze.

A werewolf.

He, Mason, the Lockwood men, they all had or have a gene that turns them into werewolves. On a full moon, his uncle was going to turn into a totally different species and Tyler could too, if the cards fell that way.

Tyler had been angry at first when he'd heard this explanation. Did Mason really think he was _that_ stupid? That he would buy this shit; that he wasn't just an angry teenage guy, but he was a teenage guy who's anger was mostly attributed to a gene that turned him into a _dog_?

He'd been inclined to just get up and leave. To just hand the stone over and forget it all if Mason didn't want him to know the truth this badly, more than happy to think that this fucking moonstone was all part of some crazy hippie drug ring, and they all licked it to get high and surf to the gods or some shit, but it seemed as if once Mason had let the truth out he couldn't stop. He couldn't let Tyler walk away until he was sure he believed the story; believed that there were other dangers in Mystic Falls, dangers that he refused to name but still warned against. Believed that he needed to be careful because even though he wasn't a werewolf now, he could be one one day.

And this is where Tyler's brain was stuck. Mason had warned him about this, had said "you won't be able to get it out of your head" over and over again, but Tyler had insisted that is uncle _just_ _tell him_.

And now here he was, laying motionless on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, unable to think about anything else.

He has to kill someone.

He has to kill someone to become another animal entirely. He has to spill human blood to become a monster. _A predator_.

Tyler wishes that he'd listened to Mason when he said he didn't want to know, or, at least, Mason could have explained it better. Hadn't made it sound like it would only stick in his mind because it was such a horrible prospect. Tyler wishes that Mason would have told him that the reason why it stays in your head, bouncing around, fusing itself to every brain cell, is because once you know what has to done, you _want_ it._Want_ to spill that blood; that once you know, the instinct to do so consumes you, pushing up against your skin, _urging_ you to go hurt someone.

But he assumes that if Mason's 'turning' story can tell him anything it is that his uncle might not know about the bloodlust; he'd killed that guy by accident. He hadn't meant to and it had all happened so quickly that Mason didn't have time to meditate on the fact. He'd had no idea what was happening until it did. He hadn't had a choice.

But Tyler does.

It doesn't feel like it, with his brain somehow now gearing itself to think towards fulfilling his base instinct -and he still can't believe that _this_ is his base instinct, something barely short of a murderer lying dormant until now - but he does have the choice. And if he concentrates hard enough, the urge to hurt - _to kill _- fades away, simmering slightly in his blood like a mild hunger that can't be fulfilled with food, but right now Tyler doesn't ignore it.

He lets his mind fill with the thoughts of killing and changing - imagines how powerful he would feel after his bones and sinews break, adjust, and reform. How fast he would be.

He tells himself its because he wants to be able to recognize when his mind wanders towards the dangerous, that the reason he allows these things to run rampant in his mind is so that he can protect innocent bystanders, but he knows deep down he lets it simmer because it's easier. It's what his body was built to do, to become, and instinct is stronger than whatever he can think up to stop it.

And he _does_ want to stop it. Just... not as much as he should.

=..=..=

Jeremy wasn't being dramatic when he'd told Elena that he didn't think he'd be okay.

He honestly doesn't know if he can do this again. Deal with the whole 'the person I'm falling for is a supernatural creature' thing again. And not because that's what they are; if Jeremy is honest, it doesn't really bother him that much- it's just another thing about them, like their hair is dark or their eyes are green. No, it's the fact that being supernatural in this town means a one way ticket being brutally murdered.

And he _can't_ lose somebody again. He and Vicky had been on the road to getting better and then she was ripped from him, and the fact that he couldn't remember, but had had to _read _about it, didn't make it hurt any less. If anything it had made him feel worse, not being able to remember, to reconcile her death with seeing it, and an old flare up of anger at Elena makes itself known, but he pushes it down. This isn't the time. And then there was Anna, God, he can still remember her smile. Slow to come, but when it did it lit up a room. Her porcelain skin, and thick dark hair underneath his fingertips, and Jeremy can still remember her lips on his. But then she was taken away too, right in front of him. Dragged away and he didn't see her again, and would never see her again.

And now Tyler... Tyler was going to be thrown until this whole thing too. He was going to play a part in this madness more likely than not (because Jeremy wasn't fool enough to think that Tyler won't trigger the gene somehow. Especially if he didn't know what set it off in the first place.) and Jeremy can't do a thing about it.

His chest tightens at the thought; at the thought of losing Tyler, of having to see him dragged away, or killed in front of him. He's just started... he can't. He just can't see himself being able to deal with it, can't imagine not seeing him, or touching him. Because if he is honest with himself, and doesn't let his fear get the best of him, he will admit that he's starting to... fall for Tyler. Actually falling in love with Tyler Lockwood and _that's _not a weird sounding thought at all. But no matter how odd it sounds either in his head or on the tip of his tongue, it's the truth, and Jeremy can't stomach the scenario where he and Tyler aren't together because Tyler is gone. Dead despite Jeremy's attempts in keeping him in the dark about the strange occurrences in Mystic Falls.

And that's another thing; even though he knows that he's not responsible for any of this, Jeremy still feels guilty. Still thinks that there was someway that he could have... prevented this. And maybe he can prevent it, by telling Tyler, but he made a promise to Elena and what she asked of him makes sense, even if he doesn't like it.

He wouldn't know what to say anyway. How to start to tell Tyler about everything, and it is because of this complete and utter lack of any idea of what to say that he doesn't go straight to Lockwood mansion when he realizes his boyfriend isn't in school.

This and the fact that he needs to be alone right now.

But that doesn't stop the anxiousness he's been feeling all day – what if something happened last night when he got back home? What if Mason demanded the stone and Tyler refused to hand it over? Would Mason really hurt him? The questions roll around his head prompting him to abandon his locker after second period and make his way to the school exit. Jeremy is halfway to the double doors leading outside, having already decided to skip third period, when another idea occurs to him; what if Tyler is fine? What if he just needed a day off to think, or maybe he just overslept?

Before this wouldn't have made a difference; Jeremy would have still gone over there – forget the rest of classes and spend the day alone with Tyler – but he finds he can't imagine doing that right now. Not when he has this huge secret he's keeping from him, not when he suspects that just looking at Tyler right now will tie his stomach in unpleasant knots.

He still skips third period - he just does it in the library. His fingers skim the spines of books who's titles or implications all have the word 'werewolf' in common but he feels ridiculous for it. The last time he researched the supernatural it was for a school project, and at the time he didn't believe in the subject matter. But now, here he is less than six months later 'browsing' again; the only difference is he's intending to apply anything he can find to his life.

But the library yields no results, instead giving him fantasy novels, and empty shelf space where Blood and Chocolate should be. He didn't really expect to find a manual entitled 'So Now Your Boyfriend May Become A Werewolf' but he'd hoped he'd find _something_ useful.

When the last bell rings, the noise finds Jeremy on the library couch. He sighs and heads out, not bothering to stop by his locker (he didn't go to any classes today, anyway). He contemplates going to the Lockwood's now, but he can't muster up enough courage to do it. He _wants _to see Tyler, his fingers itch to run themselves through the short brown hair, but he knows that if he's around him he'll let everything come out, and apparently that would cause mass confusion to the mystical creatures that reside here. He rolls his eyes.

He stands on the huge lawn, the wind picking up his hair and students swarm around him, and finally, feeling as if he's failed some important test, he turns to head home.


	12. 12

Tyler has forgotten about Jeremy.

Well, not totally; just... a bit. Or to put it accurately, he hasn't been as focused as he should be when it comes to him. He's been too focused on the power underneath the surface of his skin and trying to control it. If he weren't so preoccupied by this he might be a little more concerned about how distant Jeremy has been as of late. How for the past few days, when he as remembered to give Jeremy he call, he doesn't pick up, or that when they see each other in school, Jeremy's eyes slide away from his face and angles his body away.

He's been trying to catch his uncle, to ask him some more about this whole werewolf thing, but he hasn't seen him that much at all. After dropping this heavy revelation on Tyler, Mason is back to rushing out the front door, or brushing Tyler's questions off with a simple, 'you should be fine.' But Tyler doesn't think he will be fine at all, not when his dreams involve flashing woods, heightened senses, and power that surges through a body he's never had before. He wants to pull Mason back by the arm, turn him around, and shout that he won't be alright because he's been subconsciously picking who and when. Picking out the weakest in his Algebra class or trying to think when he could lure tiny Hannah Anderson from History away long enough to give into the need the hums in his veins.

And this scares him. It scares him enough to want to rethink this whole thing again; yes the power would be extraordinary, but is he _really _willing to do what it takes to change? And if so, what kind of person does that make him?

_Not a person. A monster._

This is what he is thinking about as he scrolls idly, unseeing through his cell phone in the Grill. He needed a familiar place that wasn't home or school to ground him in reality. A shadow falls across his table and when he looks up he sees Jeremy standing there, looking unsure. "Do you mind if I..." he gestures to the chair opposite Tyler.

"Yeah, yeah." He knows he sounds eager, but right now Jeremy's presence soothes his frayed nerves. Jeremy gives a small smile, still looking unsure _and why does he look like that? _and pulls the chair out from under the table. He sits and they both sit in silence, Tyler looking at the table, and Jeremy out into the small after school crowd. When did things get so awkward? _Why _did things get so awkward? Jeremy can't possibly know. Hell, Tyler still has his split second doubts despite the new intensity in his blood. He looks up and studies Jeremy's profile. He hasn't really looked at Jeremy for days, talked to him yes, but it's been in passing and he's had other things on his mind, but he pushes that all aside now to really take in the strong jaw and straight nose, and long eyelashes. The lips he's enjoyed so many times are twisted as if Jeremy is thinking hard about something. "Jere?" he says lowly, pitched so that only Jeremy can hear is concern his tone bordering on tender.

Just as he suspects, Jeremy's brown eyes are full of worry. "Are you okay?"

Jeremy begins to fidget, but stops himself. "Yeah." The one word is heavy despite it's intended nonchalance and Tyler feels his heart begin to beat a little faster. Why is Jeremy acting so weirdly? Tyler begins to move his hand forward, to touch Jeremy's which is laying on the table, but he remembers where they are and draws back. But it's harder to do so today. Harder than the other days, because suddenly the fact that he hasn't kissed or touched Jeremy in days hits him hard.

"Do you want to get out of her-"

"Hey Tyler" a peppy voice interrupts them and a quick turn of the head shows Aimee Bradley standing near their table, a bright smile on her face. Irritation at being cut off creeps up on Tyler but he ignores it and forces a somewhat pleasant expression on his face.

"Hey, Aimee, what's up?"

"Nothing," she states at first, but there is a coy look in her eyes. "Me and Sarah were just wondering if you and Jeremy wanted to get out of here. Go back to your place?" This is kind of a forward suggestion, but Tyler recalls how unsubtle Aimee was when she was sniffing around Matt. He wants to say no, that right now isn't the best time, especially when he looks to where Sarah is hovering in the background and notices how she's eyeing Jeremy.

A wave of possessiveness surges up in Tyler and there's that prickling of his skin and the dangerous thought that tugs at the back of his mind, the thought that _she _could be the one, and he begins to bite out "Not today," but Jeremy beats him to it.

"Yeah," he says quickly. "Yeah that sounds good."

Tyler shoots a hostile look at Jeremy who doesn't seem to see it as he's already getting up from his chair. Actually, he doesn't seem to want to look Tyler in the eyes at all, and Tyler's anger gives away to unease.

Looking back at Aimee shows her gaze still on him, waiting for confirmation. He looks at Jeremy again, who's answering a question Sarah has asked, and gives an inaudible sigh. "Yeah, let's go."

=..=..=

Jeremy doesn't know why he jumped at the opportunity. Well, actually he does – he panicked. Tyler was about to ask if they could be alone, a prospect that Jeremy has been avoiding for days, and when Aimee had swooped in, he jumped at the distraction.

But as he leans back against the piano, tumbler of some liquor he's not interested in drinking in hand, watching two drunk girls dance around, Jeremy wishes he'd thought harder about this. Tyler has an easy smile on his face, but Jeremy can tell by now that it's fake - he's trying to stay relaxed despite the fact that he is angry at Jeremy. Yes, he knows Tyler is angry with him right now, and it makes him uneasy, makes him want to fix it right away, but he can't. And not just because of the two girls giggling over some inside joke. Jeremy just doesn't know what to _say. _He doesn't know what he's trying to accomplish by staying away from Tyler, especially when all he wants to do is kiss him, or just fucking _talk _to him. But regardless, this feeling of keeping his distance overrides sense and the conflict of emotions is starting to drive him crazy.

When he'd spotted Tyler sitting at that table in the Grill, he'd hovered for ten minutes, trying to gather his courage. It was pathetic.

Sarah breaks away from the group and wanders across the big room, eyeing the expensive decorations and fingering the soft upholstery absent-mindedly. Her fingers snag on Jeremy's bag and she looks down. "Oh, you draw?" She pulls out his sketch pad and his heart jumps in his chest. "Can I see?" Jeremy sets the glass down on the piano, and quickly makes his way over to her.

"Uh, no, I don't like anyone really..."

"C'mon Jeremy." Aimee says imploringly. "An artist? Always sexy."

Jeremy lets out something he means to be a laugh, but comes out as a huff of air. He reaches forward and snags the sketch pad from Sarah's grasp before she can flip the cover over. He's taken to drawing werewolves as of late, in attempts to just get it _out _of his head (so far it isn't working), but this isn't the reason why he doesn't want them to see. He's also taken to sketching Tyler. There's a particularly damning page of just various angles, and shading, and his eyes are drawn in startling detail large scale at the bottom of the page.

It would be very hard to explain that away.

"Yeah, I don't, it's a thing I... have."

He tries to ignore the suspicious look Tyler is burning into the side of his face, and stuffs the sketch pad back into his bag. The girls shrug, and roll their eyes before launching into a conversation that Jeremy has no intention of paying attention to.

This whole thing is fraying on his nerves, he should probably leave now.

"Can we go in the other room for a minute?" Tyler's voice is low in his ear and Jeremy stiffens slightly. He really doesn't want to do that.

"Why? I mean," he quickly covers his immediate question when something close to hurt flashes in Tyler's eyes, "Sarah and Aimee..."

"They're drunk off their ass right now. They won't notice." His tone gives no room for argument and he waits for Jeremy to start walking.

Tyler waits until the double doors are closed behind them before he starts. "What the hell is the matter with you?"

Jeremy turns to face him, deciding that feigning ignorance is his best bet right now. "What are you talking about?"

Tyler takes a step closer to him. "Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Do that! Act like you have no idea what I'm talking about." Jeremy keeps his mouth shut, literally, and just shrugs. He knows hes being frustrating, can feel Tyler's annoyance building. "We haven't talked in days; you've been avoiding me, you don't seem to want to be alone with me. Why? What's going on?"

Jeremy looks away from burning brown eyes and takes a breath. "I've been busy. I guess I just assumed you were too."

Tyler shakes his head, confusion and frustration moulding together. "Busy? Busy with what, Jeremy?"

Jeremy shrugs again. "I don't know, your uncle. Keeping the moonstone safe." But they both know this isn't true – if Jeremy really thought this was the reason why Tyler would be busy he would have checked in, see how everything was going. Make sure Tyler was safe.

The silence stretches between them, and it takes a few moments for Jeremy to realize there is something funny to it; Jeremy looks back at Tyler and he doesn't look angry anymore. He looks uncomfortable, and slightly guilty, but there is still a hint of defiance. It's this defiance that suddenly has Jeremy's heart beating quicker. "Tyler... you still have the moonstone, don't you?" The defiance burns brighter and Jeremy's heart sinks. "Tyler."

"No. I gave it to Mason."

Jeremy's heart sinks. "What?"

"I gave it to him, Jeremy. I had no reason to hold onto it, and it was causing too many problems-"

"Why did you do that? You promised me you would hold onto it!"

"And then you just stopped talking to me for a week!"

Jeremy can feel the panic welling up in him. Mason has the moonstone. The moonstone they know nothing about and can really only mean trouble. It was daunting before, but now that he knows that Tyler carries this gene he is directly related to all of this. And he'd told Elena, and Elena was going to ask Stefan and what if the answer they found made everything worse? What if that stone is the trigger that can set Tyler off? And now Mason has it. Mason who _is _a werewolf and is at least a little dangerous if his threats are anything to go by. Jeremy is lost for words. He slides his hands into his hair, and stares at Tyler., disbelieving.

"You don't get, Jeremy."

_No, _you _don't get it, _Jeremy thinks vehemently, but he doesn't say anything. He can't because he knows if he does, the next thing that will come out of his mouth is something akin to the phrase 'you're a fucking werewolf,' and he can't have that. Instead he ignores Tyler's 'why does it matter so much to you?' and walks across the room, straight past Tyler who tries to grab his arm before he wrenches it away, and to the double doors. He needs to leave, to get out of here.

He walks out into the main room and makes a beeline for his bag. He swings it over his shoulder and begins to make his way to the front door when he hears Tyler say "oh hey, ladies. Not a toy." Aimee giggles and Jeremy turns to see an expensive, delicate looking crystal sphere with a dove glass dove floating in the middle of it clutched in her hand. She and Sarah must have helped themselves to more alcohol while he and Tyler were arguing because they both laugh loudly, and ignore his protests. Aimee glides past Tyler and shows her empty hands.

"Seriously guys," Tyler's nerves are undoubtedly already on edge, and Jeremy can hear his temper rising.

"Come and get it," Sarah says and darts up the stairs. Jeremy watches as Tyler runs after her, and he thinks he imagines the odd look on his face – a expression that, despite being angry, reads anticipation. But that can't be right, because as Jeremy looks up the stairs again Tyler just looks angry, his muscles taut. "Sarah," he forces out and she laughs again.

Tyler makes a swipe for the crystal sphere and everything stands still as his hand catches hers at an awkward angle and she loses her balance. Aimee's laugh dies away and the sphere is thrown from her hand as Sarah tries to right herself, but it doesn't work, her impaired state making it all the more difficult. Then everything seems to simultaneously speed up and slow down, and she falls – the sound of shattering crystal rings through the air as her body hits each stair roughly and she crumples a few feet from where Jeremy is standing.

His bag slips off of his shoulder when he rushes forward and falls to his knees. "Sarah," he says urgently over Aimee's cry. "Sarah, wake up." He shakes her roughly, but she doesn't stir. "Sarah, wake up. Sarah!" The blood rushing to his head makes him dizzy and Jeremy tries to blink back the sensation. He shakes her again.

When a smile spreads across her face and she lets out a slightly breathless laugh, Jeremy's breath whooshes out of his chest in relief. "Ugh, it was just a joke. Losers." She opens her eyes and winces as she sits up. "Ah, my fucking back."

Aimee is next to her in a second, snorting in laughter, and hitting her shoulder for scaring her, but Jeremy isn't paying attention. He's too busy looking up to where Tyler is standing on top of the stairs. He hasn't made a move to see if Sarah is alright, but that isn't what unsettles Jeremy the most – it's Tyler's expression.

His jaw is rigid, and his eyes are hard. There isn't a hint of any worry or relief at Sarah's well being, but instead, it what seems like disappointment and annoyance glitter darkly.

Jeremy blinks and shakes his head. He tears his eyes away from Tyler's still form and grabs his book bag before standing up and walking to the front door. He doesn't know what's going on, but he needs to get out of here, _now. _


	13. 13

It takes a long time for Tyler to get himself under control after Sarah and Aimee leave. He'd sat at the bottom of the long sweeping staircase for hours forcing the build up of tension and hostility down.

He'd almost killed Sarah. He'd almost killed somebody, someone he _knew_, and the only thing he'd felt when she'd first begun to fall was savage pleasure, and later, when he realized she had only been kidding, sharp disappointment and annoyance. And to make it worse, he's sure Jeremy could tell that he wasn't sorry for it. Jeremy had seen that he didn't feel bad if he had killed someone.

This isn't good.

Tyler doesn't _want _to be this person. It's wrong. His mind drifts back to his previous thought, the one he was thinking in the Grill before Jeremy had walked up. He's becoming a monster, and he doesn't want to, and he doesn't._ want. this. to. happen._ This _can't_ happen, he _can't_ change; if this is how he feels just _knowing _about it, Tyler can't imagine how he would be once the transformation is complete. He needs help. He can't do this alone, and he can't go to Jeremy even if he wanted to. He's sure that he wants nothing to do with him right now, if the way he ran out of here earlier is any indication.

He needs someone who's been through this. That's why he's been waiting on the stairs for hours.

The minute Mason walks through the door, Tyler springs to his feet. "Mason."

Mason's head snaps in Tyler's direction, alarmed, but once he realizes who it is visible relief graces his face. "Tyler, hey." He's turning away, already looking preoccupied, but Tyler isn't going to let him brush him off. Not this time.

"Look, I need to talk to you, man-"

"Can it wait? I was just stopping by for a change of clothes."

"No, it can't wait." Panic begins to lap at his senses as he watches Mason walk away.

"We can talk tomorr-"

"I almost killed someone today." Mason freezes in his tracks. "I almost killed a girl today. I pushed her down the stairs and...and..." he swallows hard. "All I could think is that I wanted her to die." He's breathing hard from the confession, and watches as Mason slowly turns around to face him. "I don't want this." He feels humiliated when his eyes burn and prick with tears, but he can't stop talking until it's all out. "All I've been thinking about is hurting people, so I can change, but I don't... I don't want to be that person-" he breaks off suddenly. His throat feels clogged and he clears his throat to no avail. He doesn't want Mason to see the rapidly building wetness in his eyes so he sinks back down onto the front step and bows his head, sliding his fingers into his hair.

He concentrates on leveling out his breathing. It feels good to have it out in the open; he didn't know the thoughts were eating at him like a cancer until he's finally said everything aloud.

But as the seconds pass his uncle still doesn't say anything and the silence causes Tyler to feel uneasy once again. Is he different? Is Mason horrified because Tyler is so savage already and he hasn't even transformed? What if- His panicked thoughts are cut off as he feels his uncle settle down next him. Tyler doesn't look up to see Mason's expression but he feels better anyway- he doesn't sit a stair up, or far away huddled neat the banister, but close enough so their shoulders touch, and Tyler realizes what his uncle is trying to tell him; he isn't afraid of him.

He lets put a shaky sigh of relief_. _

=..=..=

This is the last place Jeremy wants to be right now. It's been less than two days but he's back at the Lockwood place; this time decorating for _another _event whose purpose is vague, and ignoring Damon's wild eyed glares. When Jeremy had gotten home after darting from Tyler's foyer, he'd told Elena that the moonstone was now firmly in Mason's possession. And there was no doubt that Damon knew, if not for the stares, then for the particularly hard shoulder bump he'd received while trying to haul a box of decorations out to the tent set up in the middle of the sprawling yard.

He finally reaches the open tent and scans for an empty space to set down his box. Looking down into it shows a large amount of fairy lights, a metal thing that looks like a corkscrew, and what looks to be a... large decorative mask?

_What am I supposed to do with these?_

What is he supposed to do with these? Jeremy is beginning to think his full attention wasn't on Mrs. Lockwood when she'd handed him the box when someone enters the tent behind him. He grabs the corkscrew looking thing and turns. "Hey do you know what I'm supposed..." he trails off as he sees Tyler standing behind him.

The air suddenly feels heavy and too hot despite the fact that it's a perfectly nice day out. Jeremy says nothing; it seems as if he's always speechless around Tyler nowadays and for all the wrong reasons. _Too many secrets_. And then there's Tyler's weird reaction to Sarah getting hurt...

They stare at each other for what seems like a long time (Jeremy can't really tell - time seems kind of insignificant right now) and Tyler awkwardly shifts his weight before saying "Hey."

"Hey." he answers automatically and the silence falls again. It's _too _awkward for Jeremy and he waves the around corkscrew thing in his hand. "I'm just going to..." he gestures vaguely to somewhere, _anywhere_ outside of the tent.

He begins to walk forward, to pass Tyler but stops when Tyler blurts out, "I'm sorry."

Jeremy eyes meet Tyler's (he's closer now, and can see his eyelashes and the hint of gold flecks in his irises) and asks, "For what?"

Tyler shrugs, "For the moonstone. I know that you asked me to hold onto it, but that night I had a talk with Mason and he... explained some things."

"What kind of things?" The question is quick and an odd sense of elation begins to rise; does Tyler know too? Can he finally stop keeping these secrets?

Tyler hesitates. "Just some stuff. He was uh, pretty vague. Said he needed it for something pretty important."

Jeremy presses. "Did he explain what?"

"No. Just that it was important, but it doesn't matter," he says quickly dismissing it.

The elation in Jeremy dies and the disappointment rides through him steadily when he says "I think it matters. I mean, it has to. He threatened you _and _me." He doesn't throw in that the threat against him doesn't bother him half as much as the threat against Tyler does.

"Yeah, we talked about that too. He apologized, he's sorry about it." Jeremy scoffs but Tyler keeps going. "No, man, seriously. He's not that bad. I just... overreacted." Jeremy doesn't believe that for a second and he knows Tyler can tell because the crease in his brow deepens. "Jeremy-"

"Alright, Tyler." He doesn't want to talk about this anymore. The moonstone is gone and there is no way in hell that Mason is going to give it back, and there really is no point in discussing it anymore. He makes to walk around Tyler again but is stopped once more. This time by Tyler's gentle grip on his wrist.

His heart immediately speeds up; Tyler never touches him in public, makes a point of it actually, but here he is in the middle of his yard with dozens of people milling around, his hand almost wrapped around Jeremy's.

"Jeremy," Tyler's voice is soft, and Jeremy's pounding heart stutters and a shiver runs through his whole body when Tyler begins to stoke the inside of his wrist in small circles. He doesn't answer but keeps his thrumming body still; the urge to turn and press his body against Tyler's is _so_ strong. Instead, he shifts his gaze so that it is back on Tyler's. "I'm sorry." This is said quietly as well, and Jeremy feels weak. God, how did he go for so long without touching him? It's only been two and a half weeks, granted, but as his eyes fall to Tyler's lips all he can think about is how good they feel against his. And he can forgive him. _It doesn't even matter, the moonstone. They don't even know what it's for. All that matters right now is kissing Ty-_

"Do you know where your mother put the tables?"

Jeremy and Tyler jump apart immediately and they both turn to see Mason in the entrance to the open tent. He's glaring at Jeremy and looking annoyed. _He sure seems sorry, _Jeremy thinks sarcastically. He turns away from them both, goes back to his original table, and picks up the overly large mask.

On his way out of the tent he hears Tyler clear his throat and say, "Yeah, I think she left them out in the truck."


	14. 14

"Are you sure that she should be out of the hospital already?" The question is directed at Alaric even though Jenna is the one who answers. Jeremy ignores Elena completely. He's still livid with her.

"I'll be fine. I just have to manage not to be a klutz while laying completely still on the couch." She hobbles over to the living room, arm around Matt's shoulder. Jeremy isn't so sure about her being alright. She just got stabbed -_stabbed herself. _Jeremy's anger rises – last night and the hospital has already released her. "I mean, who walks into a knife?"

Jeremy waits until Matt has Jenna facing away from him before he pushes himself roughly away from the wall. He turns around to go into the kitchen and knows that Elena will follow, but he still doesn't acknowledge her. He can't _believe _that there has been a dangerous, psychotic vampire who looks _exactly _like her (a doppelganger, she called it) running around Mystic Falls and she never bothered to mention it to him. He had to hear about Katherine, and all the insanity she has caused, for the first time, in a hospital waiting room wondering if another member of his family was going to bleed out on an operating table.

He couldn't get anything out of Elena at first. He'd been searching of Tyler in the crowd of volunteers, intent on getting some more alone time with him, when he'd gotten a call on his cell phone, picking up only to hear between Elena's hysterical sobs that he needed to come to the hospital right away and that Jenna had been hurt. It had taken close to a half an hour for Elena to calm down enough to explain everything; that Katherine had said that she supposedly came back to town for Stefan. That she had killed Caroline (and this is where Jeremy begins to gape disbelievingly) and had turned her into a vampire. They, Elena, Stefan, Damon, and even fucking Alaric, had all figured out that what Katherine really wanted was the moonstone, and the only way that they could have possibly found out what she needed it for was to torture and fucking _kill_ Mason Lockwood, and that that's exactly what they had done. And _that _is why Jenna was in the hospital; Katherine's revenge.

Jeremy is still in a state of shock. He was under the impression that Elena had stopped hiding stuff like this from him, but obviously he was wrong. So, so incredibly wrong.

He's in the kitchen now, and he can hear her behind him setting down a bag of groceries.

"Jere-"

"Elena," he turns. He feels so tired. "Seriously. Just don't. There is literally nothing you can say that will make this alright."

"I was just trying to-"

"Protect me? Yeah, I know. I got that message the first time with what happened with Vicky." She shifts uncomfortably and he continues. "And you know, it took a while to get over it, what you did regarding that because I guess in some Elena essence it made sense. But I can't begin to think when not letting me know when someone with my _sister's face _is running around tearing up the town is best for me. I don't even _understand _how you thought that I would be better off not knowing weather or not I was talking to you was a smart choice. She is _you, _Elena. She could have been in this _house, _I could have _spoken _to her and I wouldn't even know!" She doesn't say anything in the face of his anger-laden words, and he sighs and shakes his head. "Stop trying to protect me, Elena. You aren't good at it."

He doesn't stick around to take in her hurt expression, and walks around her heading into the living room.

"Can I get you anything, Jenna?"

"Oh, no I'm fine." She cranes her head around to look at the clock on the mantel. "Shouldn't you be getting ready for the Lockwood party?"

"I'm not going to that thing. You just came out of the hospital."

She waves her hand dismissively. "I'll be fine. Alaric is coming over in a few minutes and Elena is staying home tonight."

"Why isn't Elena going?"

"Well, it's understandable, after her and Stefan breaking up. I know I always avoided parties where my ex would be. I still do actually."

The rustling of the grocery bag in the kitchen has stopped but, Jeremy doesn't look back.

"Still, I think I'll just stay-"

"No," Jenna says firmly. "Go. I'll be in more than capable hands. Plus I want to see you in that suit."

Jeremy debates it; she really would be fine without him here. He doesn't know what help he could offer anyway. And then there's the chance of seeing Tyler...

As if hearing his thoughts, Jenna says, "And won't Tyler be expecting you?"

Jeremy thinks about it for just a moment longer, remembers Tyler's fingers lingering on his wrist. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess he is."

=..=..=

Tyler doesn't want to be in this room, let alone at this party. Where he really wants to be is... actually anywhere else but here. _Somewhere with Jeremy_, he thinks and a small smile lifts his lips. Their short encounter yesterday had left him with higher hopes, especially since Jere hadn't mentioned the whole thing with Sarah falling. _Maybe he hadn't noticed how I reacted_. It had been hard not telling Jeremy that he did know more, but he had told some truth; he really didn't know what the moonstone was for, and Mason _was_ sorry for threatening him.

Their talk on the staircase that night had been a comforting one, with Mason assuring Tyler that he wasn't a monster and that his urges could be controlled. "You're only a monster if you _want _to be one," he'd said. "Yeah, at first you thought it would be cool, but you realized it isn't what you wanted." He'd put his hand on the nape of Tyler's bowed neck then, warm and reassuring. "You're a good kid Tyler." It had taken an immense weight off of his shoulders, and Tyler couldn't be more grateful. He hoped Mason knew. He's going to make sure he'll let him know as soon as he gets a chance, but he doesn't know when that will be.

His brow furrows; he hasn't seen Mason for a while now, come to think of it. He hadn't asked his mother where he was last night because Tyler assumed he was spending the night wherever he usually does, but he hadn't seen Mason this morning or so far at the party...

He's pulled by his thoughts by a drunken giggle. He doesn't really know why he's in his father's office. It doesn't exactly bring up great memories of both past and recent, but here he is, perched on the arm of a leather chair trying to look interested as Sarah drinks and Matt continues to get wasted, the latter of which makes him worry. Sure, he hasn't chilled with him for a while but, last time he checked, Matt doesn't get wasted. He barely ever drinks, but tonight he's edging on the side of belligerent.

"So, what happened to Aimee?" Sarah asks as she finishes pouring a drink. She steps to the side, staggering a bit, but finds her balance again quickly.

"I don't know, she disappeared," Matt shrugs and takes a swallow straight from the big clear bottle in his hand.

Tyler shrugs. "She's probably drunk some where."

"Like me." Matt stands up from where he was seated on the hard wood desk, and tilts the bottle in his hand so the clear liquid spills onto the expensive, embellished rug and polished floor.

"Whoa, don't do that." Tyler's confusion towards Matt's actions tonight deepen, and he watches an insolent smile, foreign to Matt's features, spreads over his face.

"What man? It's a party." Matt's lazy eyes slide over to a framed picture of his father and mother that sits on the corner of the desk, and he reaches over to pick it up, smirk widening. "Right, Dad?" Tyler watches in disbelief as Matt unscrews the bottle of alcohol with one hand and tilts it over the picture. "You know, looks like your dad wants a drink." The strong smelling liquid sloshes onto the glass and over the edges and the mild confusion Tyler felt morphs into full blown, tinted with anger. He stands quickly. "Hey, that's not cool," he moves forward, "what's wrong with you?"

Matt laughs and throws his hands to the side. "What? The guy was a dick!" He laughs some more and Tyler's anger spikes. He barely hears Sarah tell Matt to knock it off and, apparently, neither does Matt because he yanks the picture away from Tyler's reach, vodka flying into the air, and a glint appears in his eyes. "You remember how your dad used to _slap_ you around?" The sharp sting of Matt's words are accompanied by the sharp sting of an actual slap against Tyler's face.

Tyler's disbelief redoubles; why the hell is Matt doing this? His eyes scan his best friend's face but it gives no indication as to why this is happening right now. "Are you kidding?" He has to ask, this has to be a joke because Matt has never acted like this, not once. Has never shown the animosity towards Tyler that he's showing now.

"Just having fun," Matt says, his voice low and threatening despite the easy smile on his face. Tyler's eyes narrow as he takes a careful step forward. "You know all about having fun, isn't that what you and Jeremy call it, when you fuck each other." Tyler's blood runs cold, and his mind flashes back to Matt's contemplative look that afternoon of the Bri Lancaster misunderstanding. He knew Matt would figure it out, but he never thought he would react like this. He tries to ignore the hurt he feels as Matt's words sink in, and more importantly the rage that is building inside of him. He doesn't want to discuss this now, especially with Sarah in the room. Matt waves the picture, "Bet dear ol Dad would hate that."

Tyler tries to focus on not allowing the instinctual need to fight to overwhelm him, tries to ignore the thrumming in his veins. "Put the picture down man." The words are barely out of his mouth before Matt brings his hand down quickly, smashing the picture and it's frame on the edge of the desk, and Tyler pulls back sharply as glass shards fly everywhere. He walks forward immediately, hands out and puts his hands on Matt's shoulders. "Okay, you need to calm your drunk ass down right now." He tries to calm him, but Matt resists, pushing him back roughly.

"Do something about it," he taunts, moving into Tyler's personal space.

Tyler takes a deep breath; the anger is pushing up underneath his skin, trying to get out. But he won't let it, he doesn't want to hurt Matt. "I'm not going to fight you," He says in a steady voice. He stands his ground as Matt moves closer, his normally light blue eyes dark and glittering from blown pupils. His expression is an odd combination of vacant and determined, and Tyler's pulse races at the sight. Matt's not in is right mind and Tyler doesn't have a clue why this is happening right now-

Matt's attack is sudden, and the tackle knocks the wind out of his lungs and both of them to the ground. He sees Matt draw his fist back and then pain radiates through his face as bone collides against bone again and again, and just like that, the barely restrained aggression that has been simmering for days erupts and Tyler sees red.

=..=..=

He'd ignored Stefan and Damon where they stood side by side on top of the stairs that faced into the large backyard and had given Bonnie a small smile in greeting when he'd seen her hovering near the dining room, but besides that Jeremy hasn't stopped to acknowledge much of anyone. He floats around, trying to catch a glimpse of Tyler, but so far he's had no luck.

He's taking a sip from his glass when he remembers that Tyler hates these things. He'd complain about how his mother would throw these lavish 'charity events' under the guise of it being the late Mayor Lockwood's last ideas, when really it was just something to keep her mind of off everything. _He hates these things - of course he wouldn't be in the main crowd._ Jeremy recalls where he'd found Tyler during his father's funeral and makes a beeline for the darker lit hallway. When he gets there, though, it's empty and he's about to turn back and check upstairs in Tyler's bedroom when he hears a noise.

He walks slowly further down the hallway and pauses when he hears a crash and muffled voices. He gets closer to the door that is ajar when he hears another curse, and when he recognizes who it is he moves closer to swing the door open quickly. What he walks into makes him freeze in the doorway. He barely notices Sarah standing in the corner, oddly quiet, and only registers what's going on in the middle of the room.

Tyler is on top of Matt, fists clenched in the other boy's lapels. They struggle, a mass of expensive black fabric that is becoming increasingly wrinkled. Matt's hand comes up to wrap around Tyler's throat and it looks as if he's trying to flip them over, but Tyler isn't having it; he pulls his fist back and punches Matt in the jaw. And he pulls back and does it again, and again, and again, and Jeremy's brain finally unfreezes and he rushes forward. He bends down and wraps his arms around Tyler's waist, hauling him off of Matt who, despite his bloody face and increasingly swollen eye, jumps up right away.

Jeremy rips off his mask and pushes Tyler back, but keeps his hand on the other boy's rapidly falling and rising chest. "What the fuck are you doing?" He demands. Tyler doesn't answer; his eyes are bright and angry. Jeremy turns to face him fully and grabs him by the shoulders and shakes him slightly. "What's going on-" His words are cut off as he's thrown to the side, and the wind is knocked painfully out of his lungs when he hits the edge of the hard wood table, which flips, ribs first. He groans, and sharp pain lances through his chest. He turns his head to see Matt push Tyler into the wall and grab his shoulders just as Jeremy did a second ago, but instead he's banging Tyler into the hard wood. Tyler pushes forward and Matt stumbles back. Jeremy struggles to get up, but he wheezes in pain; it feels as if he's broken a rib.

Panic seizes him when he sees Tyler's expression through watering eyes; he looks murderous and it only gets worse when Matt, his own chest rising and falling rapidly, gives a nasty smirk and spits out "You goddamn faggot."

Hurt licks sharply at Jeremy's insides, but he can't pay attention to that now, not when Tyler lets out something similar to a roar and the fury radiates off of his body as he rushes forward to tackle Matt. They hit the hard wood floor again, and Tyler sits up enough to wrap his hand around Matt's neck. He bangs Matt's head against the wood floor and Jeremy struggles to sit up enough to crawl over to them. But it makes no difference because before he can make his way over, there is a flash of red and high heels, and Tyler is suddenly thrown across the room. He hits the opposite wall but immediately tries to scramble to his feet. Matt does as well, even though he is unsteady. Blood is streaked across his face.

Caroline stands in the middle of them, looking furious. "What is going on?" No one answers, and Matt makes another move to get at Tyler. "Stop," she shouts, but it's like Matt can't even hear her.

He tries to push around her, saying "I have to finish." To Jeremy's confusion, Caroline is able to keep him easily at bay despite being significantly smaller than Matt and she gives him a strange look before shocking Jeremy even more, and stops him with an elbow to the face. _She's a v__ampire, _he recalls suddenly as Matt crumples a few feet away from where Jeremy is resting back on his elbows.

Tyler straightens up, using the wall for support; his body shakes from rage and he makes a move towards Matt's still body, but Caroline stops him. "What happened?" she demands.

"He came at me." Tyler bites out, eyes never leaving Matt's form. Jeremy has never seen Tyler look like this before -even when he was fighting Jeremy himself, there was no trace of that odd gleam in his eyes or such a focus that he couldn't be torn away.

Jeremy attempts to stand again, ignoring the sharp pain in his chest, and Tyler's eyes finally move away from Matt. "Jere," the frightening gleam seeps away a bit and he sounds concerned. He's starting to move forward when it happens.

Sarah steps from the shadows and says something that Jeremy doesn't understand. _If Matt failed what?_ But he has no time to figure it out because she's picked up something sharp - he can see it glint in the low light of the room. Caroline's warning of 'Tyler look out' rings through the room, and Tyler whips around in time for Sarah to stab him in the shoulder. Tyler cries out in pain and pushes her away roughly. She stumbles and trips on the overturned table and goes down. The sound her skull and neck make as they hit the edge of the desk makes Jeremy's stomach roll.

Tyler fingers his wound before he drops to his knees next to Sarah's body and begins shaking her. De ja vu hits Jeremy like a wave, but it passes seconds later when Sarah doesn't open her eyes and say psych. Her eyes remain closed, and her body limp, and it doesn't matter how much Tyler calls her name, telling her to wake up, she doesn't. Finally he stops shaking her, and from is vantage, Jeremy can see he's just staring down at the body in shock. _God, the body_, Jeremy thinks and he feels sick.

He can see Tyler start to tremble and Jeremy's alarm sky rockets.

"Tyler," he says and he can hear the distress in his voice but Tyler doesn't answer. Instead he raises quickly to his feet and backs into a corner, eyes looking wild. "This can't happen, this can't happen" he says over and over and suddenly he's doubling over. Both Caroline and Jeremy call out his name but he doesn't respond except to let out a gasp of what sounds like pain. He straightens up and his hands fist near his head. He lets out another choked gasp and he falls to his knees, body tight as if in the throes of a seizure. Jeremy forgets all about the pain in his chest and ignores the sharp tug at his muscles as he moves quickly over to Tyler. "Tyler? Tyler what's happening? Tyler-" he finally gets close enough to grab onto Tyler's shoulder, but removes his hand quickly, as if burned, when Tyler finally looks up and their eyes meet.

Jeremy feels as if his racing heart has stopped mid-beat when he looks into Tyler's glowing yellow irises.


	15. 15

"...and Matt and Tyler were fighting, and things got out of hand, and Sarah just fell." Caroline's voice washes over Tyler. He feels disconnected and hyper aware at the same time; he's jittery and his insides feel as if they are burning up. His eyesight is sharper than usual and his heart beats faster than normal.

He looks over at Jeremy and his stomach tumbles. He's sitting in the couch now, having finally been able to get up off the floor, and he looks stunned. Matt is still passed out cold and Tyler wonders for the millionth time what the fuck was going through his mind. And Sarah's for that matter, but he'll never know that one. An intense wave of sadness and shame washes over him. He did this; there are two still bodies in his father's office, one of them dead by his own hands. He should have stopped; he should have stopped fighting with Matt, but at the time he didn't _want_ to. He _couldn't. _The rage and instinct had taken over and Tyler couldn't do a thing about it.

And now Sarah was dead, Matt was probably concussed, and Jeremy had been there to see the whole thing. He looks back at the chair and sees Jeremy wince in pain as he shifts. _And Jeremy had gotten hurt. _His feelings shift abruptly from sadness to anger.

That's another thing – he feels everything so strongly now. All of his feelings and emotions are intense to the fullest and it adds to the unrest that buzzes around inside of his mind.

"...how awful. I don't even know..." Mrs. Lockwood looks lost; it's understandable. A girl is dead at her party, and, by the looks of it, it's all her son's doing. She shakes her head absently, "I need to call the police. They need to come here and... and they need to know about this." Her eyes scan the room again, flitting over Matt and the upset furniture -broken glass glittering on the floor, and Jeremy sitting on the couch, hand pressed to his side. Her gaze finally comes to rest on Tyler's face and the confusion and disappointment is clear on her face. She turns and leaves the room.

Caroline turns to him, "Tyler," but he doesn't stay to listen – instead he brushes past her and walks briskly out into the hallway.

He ignores all the guests and climbs the stairs. The moment he gets into his room he throws off his suit jacket. He can't think. He can't think and it's too hot in here. He struggles with the buttons on his shirt and he tugs harder. The rip of the fabric echos in his room along with the sound of buttons hitting the floor, and he looks dumbly down at the scraps of white cotton in his hands.

_This is too much. _He pulls the shirt out of where it's still tucked in and throws it off of his shoulders and into a corner. But he's still too fucking hot and his head is killing him. He walks quickly over to his mirror and leans into it; he doesn't look any different. He doesn't have the word 'werewolf' tattooed across his forehead, or fur, or anything that would give him away, and he knew he wouldn't, but still. _How can he look so normal when he's anything but?_

=..=..=

Jeremy waits for a few minutes before following Tyler out of the room. He knows the ambulance will be coming soon, and that he should probably stick around so that they can check out his ribs, but right now his chest is aching for a completely different reason.

He's terrified, but it probably can't compare to how Tyler is feeling right now.

He weaves through the laughing guests, masked and oblivious, and makes his way up the grand stairs. He pauses outside of Tyler's door for a few moments, listening for what, he doesn't really know, and then opens it without knocking.

Tyler is standing, shirtless, in front of his dresser, hands planted on the dark wood and his shoulders are hunched. His bowed head snaps up at Jeremy entrance. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"No," Jeremy shakes his head and takes a few steps closer. "You're not."

"Yes, I am," his voice is tight. "Just go, Jeremy."

"No." The word falls from his mouth easily. There is no way that he's going to leave Tyler alone right now. "I know you're not alright-"

"No, you don't." Tyler gives a laugh that holds no humor, and a little desperation, and pushes himself away from his dresser. He begins to pace and he lifts a hand to run nervously though his hair. "You don't know. No one does and-" he cuts off and seems to crumble slightly. His delicate veneer of control is cracking and Jeremy can see how affected he really is. He can't keep this from him anymore, he decides right then. His heart _hurts _from all the lies_. _He can't let Tyler do this alone.

He moves closer. "I do know Tyler," he keeps his voice low but Tyler raises his own.

"Stop saying that!" The frustration radiates off of his body and he turns to glare at Jeremy. "That down there, you have no idea-"

"You're a werewolf." The words are heavy in his mouth and when they come out he feels so much lighter. In the face of his announcement, Tyler looks stunned and Jeremy continues on. "You're a werewolf, now. I guess the trigger was to..." he swallows hard, "to kill someone, and you did, and now..." He fades off.

The silence rings through the bedroom and the sounds of the party in the background taunts them.

"How..." Tyler manages to get out and Jeremy gives an awkward half shrug.

"It's kind of a long story, and I promise to explain it all later... but your eyes, down there. Those were a pretty big giveaway." He sees Tyler's hand automatically raise to touch carefully under his eye and then he lets it drop. The quietness falls again. Jeremy tries to think of what he can say to make this, if even a little, better. "Look, Ty-"

"What am I going to do?" his voice is quiet and the utter loss that it carries has Jeremy aching to touch him, to give him comfort. "What am I going to do, Jere?"

"I don't know, but-" the 'we'll think of something' part of his sentence gets cut off as Tyler continues.

"I'm a monster, now. You have no idea. I'm so hot, inside it feels like everything is burning up. And I'm jittery-" Tyler's voice shakes and Jeremy can't hold back anymore. He moves into his personal space looks down into Tyler's terrified eyes.

"You're not a monster-"

"Yes. I am. You don't-"

"I _do _know. I know you," his words come out quickly in hopes to override Tyler's panicked thoughts and keep them at bay. "You're not a monster, Ty. You're _not-_"

"I'm going to... _change. _On the next full moon, and I'm going to be alone and I don't know what to do-"

Jeremy cups the back of Tyler's neck with one hand and he places the other on his warm chest. "No, no, you won't be," he tries to soothe him, keeping his voice low and his words seamless. "You won't be alone. I love you and we're going to deal with this together, I'm not going to leave you alone with this, I promise..." He continues on in this vein for a few more seconds until he catches sight of Tyler's odd expression. He stops. "What's wrong?" he asks.

"What did you say?"

"I'm not going to abandon you with this, Tyler." Does Tyler really think he would? He shakes his head. "What? You think because we haven't spoken for a few days that-"

"You love me?"

"What-" he stops abruptly when he remembers that he has indeed let it slip. Not that it isn't true, he just didn't mean to say it. At least not right then. He feels his cheeks flush, and his face is burning when he stammers "Yeah, well I mean-" he looks away and lowers his head, forgetting that his hair is, for the most part, slicked back and not able to cover his eyes. "Yeah. I... yeah."

Tyler doesn't say anything. They stand there, Jeremy's hands still where they are, and Tyler's down by his side, and Jeremy can feel the tension swirling around them and he shouldn't have said anythin-

And then Tyler's strong hands are on the sides of his face, and he's pulling him in, and their lips are pressed together. Tyler kisses him hard, passionate and Jeremy has to tighten his hands on the nape of Tyler's neck and shoulder just to hold on. They pour everything into this; Tyler's frustration, and confusion and how afraid he is, and Jeremy's guilt for keeping so many secrets, and empathy, and the _need _to help Tyler anyway he can.

But most importantly, Jeremy can feel what Tyler is trying to tell him; that he loves him too. He won't say it, not now, not yet, and Jeremy doesn't expect him to. He's sure Tyler hasn't told anyone that he loves them in a long time. But this kiss is enough. This kiss that has Jeremy feeling elated, and invincible, and weaker by the second. Tyler's hands move down his chest and stomach, and settle on his hips, and he pulls sharply so that their bodies are pressed flush together and Jeremy gasps into his mouth at both the sensation of being so close to Tyler again and the fracture in his chest.

But he doesn't care about his rib, not when Tyler's hands are gripping him so tightly, and is biting at his lips, and caressing his tongue with his own, and he tastes perfect._ He tastes just like a kiss should taste_, and the thought makes no sense, but it's there. He runs his nails lightly through the hairs on the back of Tyler's neck and Tyler inhales deeply through his nose and changes the pace of the kiss. He still keeps his grip on Jeremy's hips, but his mouth slows. He runs his tongue softly over the seam of Jeremy's lips and Jeremy gives a violent shiver that he doesn't have time to recover from because Tyler takes his bottom lip between his teeth and bites down before sucking on it gently.

Jeremy can't breathe. His body is trembling, and Tyler's _everything _is making him lightheaded, and the pain in his chest seems to increase. Tyler's tongue slides against his one last time before he pulls away and rests their foreheads together. Jeremy keeps his eyes closed as he pants. A kiss has _never _made him feel that way. Ever. He didn't know they _could._ Tyler's hands slide up and down his back slowly and he moves his head to the side to nuzzle his nose in the hollow under his jaw.

Jeremy wonders if this is wrong; to feel so content and peaceful considering what has just happened, and what is going to happen, but he can't help it. The danger of the situation at hand is still fresh in his mind, but it's dulled a bit when faced with just holding onto Tyler, having his scent surrounding him again.

They pull apart and Tyler waits until Jeremy opens his eyes to ask, simply, "Stay tonight?" Jeremy nods 'yes' just as there is a knock at the door, and they pull apart.

"Ty?" Jeremy hears Mrs. Lockwood say through the wood. She tries the handle and pushes the door open gently. She gives Jeremy a small fleetingly sad smile and turns worried eyes onto her son. "Ty, the police are here. They need a statement." Tyler nods and turns around to reach for a discarded T-shirt on his bed to pull over his head. Mrs. Lockwood turns back to Jeremy. "And an ambulance is here - you should get that rib looked at."

Jeremy nods too, and her gaze slips off of him. She looks at nothing for a few moments before she squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head sadly. She turns around and heads back downstairs.

Once Tyler is covered up and he gives Jeremy another long look before seeming to brace himself to follow after his mother.


	16. 16

Loved him.

Jeremy loved him.

_Loves. Present tense_.

"And Matt just- _attacked _you? With no provocation?" Sheriff Forbes's voice jerks him a little closer to the surface and Tyler hears himself answering her question.

"Yeah, he, uh, started talking reckless, and started smashing things…" He trails off as he watches through the open window as the paramedics check Matt over. The one working on him, a short woman with dark hair, turns to another worker, a blonde man, says a few words, and turns back to speak to Matt, who nods. He still looks dazed as he lays down on the gurney he's been sitting on, and from this angle Tyler can see the dark bruises covering his face and his split bottom lip. He's distracted from his best friend's mess of a face when a second gurney, this one with a black body bag strapped to it, is pushed by.

He can hear the guest's confusion as they file pass the closed door to the room where he, his mother, and Sheriff Forbes sit. Combined with the dramatic dresses, tailored suits, and bright masks, the ambulances and cop cars, not to mention two stretchers going into separate vehicles, Tyler feels as if he is in a bizarre movie where he's the next to go. _Or the reason why it's all happening. _

His mother touches his arm gently and he blinks, trying to refocus on what's going on in this room. He looks at Caroline's mother and blesses the fact that he grew up with Caroline, and therefore knows Liz so well. Anywhere else he would probably have been handcuffed and in the back of a squad car already. "Matt looks pretty rough," she says. "You don't seem to have a scratch on you."

Tyler shrugs, trying to appear equal parts shook up, innocent, and nonchalant even as his heart beats furiously in his chest and mind races, panicked, self hating thoughts overlapping each other in his head.

_That's because I'm not human anymore-_

_I could probably get shot in the chest and be perfectly fine-_

_I'll probably rip your throat out one night because I can't help myself-_

_I won't have a mark then either-_

"I've gotten into more fights than he has," he says instead, calmly, folding his hands to hang between his knees, deciding that the _other_ truth would be the best solution right now. "He wouldn't stop. It was like he wasn't all here, like someone was _controlling_ him… He just kept coming _at _me, and his eyes were like they were empty, and he wouldn't stop-"

Liz studies him for a moment, a furrow beginning to make its place in her brow, and her hand shakes a little as she writes something in her little notepad. His mother shifts beside him on the couch and Tyler unlaces his fingers to rub the back of his neck with his palm.

"And Sarah tried to stop you?"

"Yeah." Tyler lets out a heavy breath, remembering how suddenly she'd appeared. "Yeah, she, uh, came out of nowhere- well she was standing in the corner, and said some things-"

"What kind of things?"

"I don't know," he says, temper rising. "I wasn't really paying attention. She was trying to st-" He stops speaking abruptly, and his mother and Liz give him funny looks. He'd been about to tell them that she'd tried to stab him but his mind flashes back to his shirtless reflection in the mirror wherein his skin showed no marks. No puncture wounds or anything besides maybe a little redness from irritation, and even though he can pass off a clean face and barely bruised knuckles, a super healing stab wound he cannot. He clears his throat and reminds himself to pick up the bloody letter opener first chance he gets. "She tried to stop me, tried to hop on my back, but I pushed her away and I guess she tripped on something and…"

The room falls silent.

Suddenly Tyler can't take it anymore as the knowledge that he _killed someone_ washes over him yet again. He puts his elbows on his knees, bows his neck, and laces his fingers on the back of his head, rubbing the hair furiously.

"Tyler?" His mother's touch is gentle on his arm and the silence thickens. He leans away from her when all he wants to do is the exact opposite and looks up, taking a few deep breaths through his nose.

"Are we done now?" He asks, itching to get up.

"Just a few more questions," assures Liz, but Tyler barely hears her because when he looks outside of the window Jeremy is now with the paramedics, gingerly taking off his shirt. Even from here, Tyler can make out the bruising, can see the tissue-deep purples and blues, and he can feel Jeremy's wince of pain as the blonde paramedic prods. "Were they drinking?" Sheriff Forbes asks, and it sounds as if her voice is coming from underwater again as Tyler focuses on Jeremy trying to raise his arm.

"Yeah," he murmurs, not glancing away from the window. "Yeah, they were drunk."

==.==.==

"What happened to you?" Jeremy whips around, wincing at the throb of his freshly wrapped ribs. Elena stands behind him, and the arms she has wrapped around herself does nothing to hide the bloom of red bloodstains on her pink shirt.

"What happened to _you?_" Jeremy counters. She looks cold, and exhausted, and holds herself in a wounded way.

"I asked you first," she sighs.

"Long story," Jeremy brushes it off. "Now answer me."

"Long story," she says and looks away, out at the ambulances a few feet away. "Who got hurt?" The 'besides me' hangs in the air, and the dread is heavy even before he answers her.

_Start with the easiest first. _"Well, I had to get my ribs wrapped." Elena's eyes snap back to his and she starts forward, but he puts a hand up to stop her. "I'm fine. I don't need to go to the hospital. They won't be able to do anything anyway." She opens her mouth to speak, but Jeremy continues. "I'm going tomorrow though. Pain meds." Elena suddenly looks unsure, more than likely remembering his attempted overdoes and heavy drug use even before then. "Don't worry. I won't…"

They both look away and back at the milling people either heading to their cars or unwilling to leave just yet.

"Who else?" Elena murmurs.

"Matt. He got into a fight."

"Again? With who?"

"Uh," he scratches the back of his neck, "with Tyler."

"_Again?_" Elena's have widened and she shakes her head in vague confusion.

"He just… he'd been drinking, and he got carried away, I guess. I don't know. I walked in right in the middle of it. That's how I got this." He gestures to his chest. "He threw me into a table…" Elena looks as if she is at a loss for words, and Jeremy understands. Saying it aloud, saying that _Matt _did these things, makes even it even harder to believe. "He's pretty messed up, he was very… determined. Tyler's fine."

Elena says nothing for a few moments, deep in thought, but seems to force herself to ask one more time. "Anyone else?"

"Sarah," Jeremy answers and figures the next part would be best to say quickly. His voice breaks anyway. "She- she's dead." The shock on his sister's face makes him wish he wasn't the one to tell her. He doesn't know if Elena knew Sarah well or not, but still. "She tried to… I don't even know. She started saying things that didn't make any damn sense, and then she tried to stab Tyler with a letter opener, and things got crazy." He thinks. "Well, crazier. She fell and hit her head on the corner of the desk, and her neck-"

Elena shakes her head, again, looking horrified with eyes that are overly bright. Jeremy doesn't know what to do or say, and just like that night at the hospital, he wraps an arm around her shoulders while she tries to compose herself against his chest. It takes a few minutes, but eventually Elena she pulls back, wiping her eyes, looking twice as tired. "I'm-" her voice cracks and she clears her throat. "I'm going to head home. I can't even… Too much has happened tonight and I just can't…"

Jeremy nods. He understands. "You need a ride?"

She shakes her head and wipes at her eyes again. "I'll see you there soon?"

Jeremy looks back up the still brightly lit Lockwood house. "Nah. I mean," he looks back down at Elena, "I promised Tyler I would stay the night. But unless you want me to-"

She shakes her head. "No, no. I'll be fine. Stay. You promised. I'll be fine. I just need to go back home and get some sleep."

"You sure?"

She gives him a small watery smile. "Yeah. I'll see you in the morning, or at school."

"Yeah, alright." Jeremy ignores the sharp pain that results from giving her a two armed hug.

He watches her take out her cell phone as she walks towards her car, and wonders if he should have mentioned what else happened tonight as a result of the fight. He watches Elena talk on the phone for a few more seconds before turning away. _No_, he thinks heading back up to the Lockwood mansion to slip into Tyler's room, he does not need Stefan or Damon all over him and Tyler tonight. _Or ever_.

==.==.==

A 'few more questions' turns out to be another hour and a half of the _same_ questions asked a million different ways, and by the time Tyler exhaustedly makes his way back up to his room, everyone is gone, and he's glad for it; he does not want to speak at all for the rest of the night. His mother gives him a lingering, worried gaze that he ignores as he walks up the sweeping stairs, and doesn't wonder what she and Liz are conversing about in low voices near the front door.

He hasn't forgotten that he's asked Jeremy to stay the night, but he still pauses briefly in the doorway when he walks into his darkened room to find him asleep on his bed.

He quietly shuts and locks the door behind him and leans against the wood. Will he ever get used to Jeremy waiting for him? _I love you. _The words replay in his head and his stomach does a funny kind of flip. God, he is turning into a sap. And it's true; take right now for instance – despite everything that is happening a soft smile plays on his lips as he watches Jeremy shift in his sleep, and all Tyler feels is a warm rush in his veins, and all Tyler wants to do is brush his thumb across his cheekbone.

His suit jacket is off and his shirt is un-tucked and rumpled from the sheets, but his hair is still slicked back for the most part and he's kept on his slacks and black socks.

Tyler has never seen anything more attractive.

He toes off his own shoes, pads across the room, and settles down next to his boyfriend, who starts awake, drawing a deep breath through his nose. His alert eyes dim slightly when he sees Tyler and seems to remember where he is. "Hey," he says voice slightly husky from sleep. "Sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep. I was going to knock on the door downstairs but, you know, I didn't want to interrupt and I figured if they want to question me they will eventually. Why are you looking at me like that?"

Tyler can imagine what Jeremy sees – an expression that is a mixture of serious, and fondness, and affection, and he's probably doing that soft smile but with eyes that roam Jeremy's features. He doesn't answer, but reaches his hand up to stroke Jeremy's check with his thumb. Jeremy leans into Tyler's touch and his eyes slide shut briefly. When he opens them back up, they're a soft brown that warms Tyler up even further. "What?" Jeremy asks again, quietly this time, but Tyler still doesn't answer, choosing instead to lean over and press his lips to Jeremy's. _I love you. _He hears the words again, and his heart squeezes, and he slides his tongue past Jeremy's lips softly.

_He always tastes so perfect. Is someone supposed to taste so perfect every single time? _

Jeremy goes to rise up on his elbows, but his hiss of pain fills Tyler's mouth and Tyler presses him down gently with a palm to his shoulder. _I love you. _It floats around and Tyler wants to take care of Jeremy and whispers as much into the skin of his neck.

He unbuttons Jeremy's shirt as he kisses behind his ear and allows his mouth to skim down to bite at collarbones. Jeremy's legs part easily for him to kneel between. The anger spikes again when he sits back and sees the layers of clean, white gauze wrapped tightly around his chest, but Jeremy's fingers smooth down his arm, and wrist, and plays over the knuckles of his right hand and the anger seeps away to replaced by something much more desirable.

Taut skin jumps under his lips when he kisses Jeremy's stomach and he does it again and again, loving the feel of silky soft flesh heated under his mouth and the growing bulge that bumps his chin as it strains against black fabric.

Tyler's only done this a few times; it's always been like a line. A line that, if he crosses it, will officially make him… it would put a title on him – one that he didn't think he deserved even though he enjoys what he and Jeremy do immensely. Jeremy has no problem doing this, Tyler thinks as he unbuckles his boyfriend's belt and undoes the button. Jeremy has no qualms about putting Tyler in his mouth. He has no issue with giving Tyler pleasure anyway he can. Jeremy loves kissing Tyler's hipbones, and stomach, and inner thighs; Jeremy is always giving and willing. He eases Jeremy's pants down past his hips to rest mid thigh. He doesn't worry about what labels his actions might lend to him because he loves Tyler.

And Tyler thinks he loves him too. He can't be sure, but as he buries his nose into the curly hairs at the base of Jeremy's cock, deeply inhaling his musky scent and revels in the feeling of fingers carding through his hair, Tyler knows that he's never felt this way about anyone before.

He kisses hot, smooth flesh, and hips pump upwards subtly. Another kiss and a long lick along the fat vein on the underside and the shuddering breaths are turned into a single low moan when Tyler takes him all in with one smooth motion.

He _likes_ doing this, he decides as Jeremy falls apart underneath him. He _likes_ it _a lot; _likes when he swirls his tongue around the fat head, making sure to lap at the beading pearls of liquid in the slit and Jeremy mutters a curse. Likes the feeling of Jeremy alternately tugging and smoothing at his hair and trying to pump hips that are held down by rough hands. And he _loves _the sound his boyfriend makes when he takes him all the way down his throat and swallows: it's a broken cry that ends in a desperate sounding "fuck, Tyler. _Fuck._"

It takes a few tries but Tyler figures out how to breathe through his nose while he swallows and he does it again, and again, and again until Jeremy is panting, hands fisted in the sheets, trying to keep his voice down. "I'm going- ah, oh God- I'm-" is the most he can get out before Tyler slides up and swallows around the head of his cock.

Jeremy erupts in his mouth and even though he was afraid all those other times to admit it to himself, _this _is his favorite part; Jeremy's essence spreading over his tongue and filling his senses. Sliding down his throat and running down his chin. And the way Jeremy _sounds_, like he'll never catch his breath again and only has enough left to sigh Tyler's name…

He lets Jeremy's cock slip from his mouth, and hears Jeremy's breath catch in his chest as he watches Tyler lick his bottom lip and run a finger up his chin to catch any stray salty drops. His cock gives a small twitch when Tyler kisses the tip.

He lays flat on stomach and settles his head on Jeremy's rapidly rising and falling stomach and closes his eyes when those fingers begin to card through his hair again. He wants to raise his head and look up at him but he's sure the sight of Jeremy loose and disheveled will tempt him too much. His dick is hard enough to cut stone right now and Jeremy's ribs cannot withstand Jeremy getting fucked through the mattress.

"You are way too good at that," he finally gets through deep breaths and Tyler smiles slightly against his skin, giving a little huff of sleepy laughter. God, he's tired and his throat is a little sore, but the buzzing in his brain has slowed and he doesn't feel nearly as antsy anymore.

He feels Jeremy try to sit up, probably to do something to help Tyler feel nearly as satisfied as he is, but Tyler shakes his head against Jeremy's skin. "I'm good," he says and his voice is slightly hoarse from his enthusiastic performance a few minutes ago.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, lay back down." He rubs his thumb idly over Jeremy's hipbone.

Jeremy does as he says, and returns to stroking Tyler's hair. "I guess now wouldn't be the best time for me to explain things? About how I know…everything."

"Later," Tyler mumbles. He's so tired and he doesn't want to think about anything right now- nothing other than how good it feels to be lying against Jeremy and the heavy feeling in his limbs that foretells sleep. "Tomorrow. The story will be the same, right?"

"God, I hope so," Jeremy murmurs. His fingers continue their threading, and Tyler's thumb stays idle, and nothing is said for the rest of the night.


	17. 17

When Jeremy wakes up a few hours later he and Tyler have somehow maneuvered themselves under the blankets and he is hesitant to remove himself from the cocoon of warmth. Tyler surrounds him - his head rests on Jeremy's chest as well as an arm flung over his torso along and one leg inserted between the other boy's. Jeremy smiles to himself - he's never told Tyler how much of a blatant cuddler he is when he's asleep - he would deny it anyway. Plus, Jeremy likes knowing something innocent that Tyler doesn't. He scratches the base of Tyler's neck gently, but the boy doesn't stir, not that Jeremy blames him - he must be exhausted from last night and a glance at the clock shows Jeremy that it is only five forty six in the morning. He needs to get going soon, he thinks, but doesn't stop rubbing Tyler's back gently.

How is he going to tell him? How is he going to explain to Tyler everything about vampires, and doppelgangers, and werewolves? And the hardest of all - how is he going to justify _not_ telling him about what _really_ happened to Vicki? To Mason? Jeremy's heart gives a violent thump and his stomach flips. God, how is he going to explain that his own sister's boyfriend killed _his_ boyfriend's uncle. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath through his nose, trying to calm down. He'll cross that metaphorical bridge when he gets to it.

By six twelve he has slipped out from underneath Tyler's sleep heavy body and scribbled a note saying that he'll see him at school in a few hours. Jeremy intends to get out of the Lockwood house unnoticed (even though he's sure Mrs. Lockwood has seen his car is the only one left in the driveway from last night) but a voice stops him dead in his tracks as he passes the kitchen.

"How are your ribs feeling?"

Carol Lockwood, probably not having slept the night before, looks exhausted where she sits at the kitchen island. A cup of what smells like coffee sits on the counter cradled between her hands. She doesn't seem confused or angry to see him trying to slip out of her house in the wee hours in the morning, hair rumpled and clothes wrinkled, but Jeremy still shifts uncomfortably on his feet anyway.

"Uh," he stumbles, in response to her question, "they're- they still hurt but I'm getting pain medication later on so..." he trails off and shifts again.

Mrs. Lockwood nods and looks down into her coffee cup. "How is he?" She asks softly after a few moments of silence and Jeremy's mind goes into a mini tailspin. Is she asking because she assumes he would know because he and Tyler are friends or because she knows where he spent the night, because she knows they are more than friends? He forces himself to calm down and clears his throat before answering.

"Uh, he's," he thinks, wanting to be as truthful as possible. "He's freaked. Pretty worried and really afraid. But I think he'll be okay... eventually."

She still stares into her cup and Jeremy wonders if he can walk away now. If he does he can assume she knows nothing and not freak out about this all day-

"I've been thinking all night," her voice is soft and sad. "What... would this have happened if his father were still here?" Jeremy says nothing, and she continues on. "And then, of course, that reminds me of the fact that I only have Tyler left." A few more moments of silence pass and soon Carol seems to gather her senses, and when she looks up from the depths of her cup she has the cool mask of a mayor's wife back in place. "Tyler never mentions you." Jeremy's chest gives a sharp ache and he tries not to let it show, but her sharp eyes are trained on his face. He looks down and still doesn't speak. What can he say? "Not even once, which is odd because you and he spend an awful lot of time together." Jeremy can't breathe and his face burns. "And I suppose it's no surprise - he's always kept the important things from us. His father never really encouraged total honesty." Bitterness has entered her voice and Jeremy looks up. "And I never really gave an otherwise impression, so, in retrospect, I suppose that it's partially my fault. That even with Richard gone he still feels like he can't come to me... can't tell me things." The bitterness is gone and she gives a sad smile "Luckily I'm an observant woman. I just- I wish that he knew that he's my son and I'd love him no matter what."

Jeremy is speechless.

He...thinks... Carol Lockwood just acknowledged the fact that he son is gay. But he can't be sure because that would mean that... Carol Lockwood just acknowledged the fact that her son is gay. And seems okay with it.

But Jeremy barely has time to process any of this because Mrs. Lockwood is rising from her chair and picking up her cup. "You should get going," she says over her shoulder as she turns on the water to rinse out the mug. "School starts in a couple of hours. And don't forget to tell your sister to come pick up her car later on."

**o o o**

The first thing Jeremy does when he gets in the house is take a shower. He's surprised that Elena hasn't beaten him to it, but it makes sense when he peeks into her bedroom and sees that her bed is untouched. Guess whatever went on last night brought her and Stefan back together.

Jenna is up and walking around the kitchen, flinching in pan if she moves to quickly or raises her arms to reach for things in the cabinets.

"Sit down," Jeremy tells her, reaching for the cereal for her. "Where's Alaric?"

"He went home to get his lesson plans and head on over to the school," says Jenna and she winces as she sits on the stool. "Why isn't Elena down yet?"

"She spent the night at Bonnie's," Jeremy lies easily. The last thing Jenna needs right now is to be told that Elena spent the night at her boyfriend's house.

"You too?" She asks with a raised eyebrow and a tone of voice that indicates that she already knows the answer.

"No, I spent the night at Tyler's. Some... stuff went down last night and he was freaking out."

Jenna's brow furrows. "What kind of stuff?"

Jeremy sighs – she'll read about it in the newspaper or watch the coverage on the news anyway. By the time he explains everything ( leaving out a few key elements) Jenna's mouth is hanging open slightly and she looks pained. "Oh my God," she says softly.

"Yeah," Jeremy says and rises from his seat. He needs to get going.

"Is Tyler going to be okay?" she asks and Jeremy pauses.

"Hopefully."

**o o o**

"Look," Jeremy begins when he sees Stefan in the hallway. "Elena's gotta let me know if I'm supposed to cover for her. I mean Jenna's cool with the two of you, but you guys are pushing it-"

'What are you talking about?" asks Stefan, looking confused.

"You and Elena – look I'm glad you two are back together but if she's gonna sleep over you gotta-"

Stefan stops walking in the crowded hall to hold up a hand. "Hold on, wait a minute. We're not back together.

"Wait – she didn't stay at your place last night?"

"No, I saw her at the party but that was it. She didn't sleep over..."

There is an uneasy silence and even as Jeremy says the words he knows that something is seriously off. "Cause her bed hasn't been slept in... and Mrs. Lockwood said that her car was still in the driveway... Where is she then?"

**o o o**

Tyler stuffs the now dislodged lock from his locker into his pocket and looks around quickly to see if anyone noticed. His throat is tight, his heightened senses are making the crowded hallway too bright and too loud, and that weird burning feeling is running through his veins. He leaves his locker without getting what he needs and scans the hallway – he wants, _needs_, to see Jeremy. This morning he'd woken up to a swamp of images from the night before and the intense, almost irrational, need to have Jeremy next to him. He'd gotten over it quickly enough when he'd seen the note left for him, but when his mother had given him those strange, disappointed looks, most likely borne out of accidently killing one of his classmates, the need to be around someone who knew everything spiked.

He doesn't find Jeremy, but does see Caroline. She spots him at the same time and she walks up to greet him.

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

_Dangerous, crazy, like I'm still asleep._ "Fine. I mean, I'm freaked but... you know..."

Caroline nods and peers at him, as if waiting for him to say something else. _Does _she expect him to say something else? Did she see what happened to his eyes? Is she expecting him to explain that meltdown? Because he won't, and not only because for the most part he honestly _can't. _

"Well..." she says slowly and gives him another weird look. "I'm glad everything is... fine."

Tyler nods briskly and looks away from her, feeling uncomfortable. "Yeah... listen, I have to find- I just -" he looks back at her. "I'll see you later."

He ignores the bewildered expression on Caroline's face as he walks away.

**o o o**

When Jeremy finds himself with a cut palm and a chanting Bonnie in Alaric's empty classroom the main thing he can think (besides the fact that his sister may be in gave danger) is the fact he has to somehow fit the fact that Bonnie is a damn witch into his story later on for Tyler.

o o o

When Tyler finally gets to see Jeremy it is much later in the day then he expected and he looks exhausted. "You okay?" he asks as he sits on Jeremy's bed.

Jeremy nods and slumps down against the pillows eyes closed.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, just... I guess I'll get to it all eventually." He rubs a hand roughly over his face and opens his eyes to look at Tyler. His eyes move over Tyler's face, taking in his features, before he sighs and sits up. "How are you doing?"

Tyler shrugs. He's not in the mood to talk about himself. He wants information and Jeremy must sense this because he sucks in a breath and says, "I... I promised to tell you everything. So, here goes." He takes another deep breath and lets it out in a huff. "There are vampires."

Tyler blinks. "What?"

"Vampires, they're real. And all over the place. Well, all over Mystic Falls. And there are werewolves as you already know and apparently there are witches, but I just found that part out today."

This has all been said in a rush and Tyler doesn't know what to say. He's tempted to call bullshit even though he _knows _Jeremy isn't lying. If he, Tyler, a werewolf, can exist then vampires sure fucking can. But still... "What?" he asks again, dumbly.

Jeremy tries again. "Let me just say, I'm only telling you what I know, Whatever Elena told me; she knows most of it. All of it really." He shifts and stares at his hands. "There are vampires. They exist and you know them. Stefan and Damon Salvatore... Caroline-" Tyler feels his eyes bug out of his head. _Caroline? _Caroline_ is a vampire? _ "Anna was one... Vicki."

Tyler already can't take anymore. "What – when – when did this all happen?"

"It's a really long story," Jeremy says, almost absentmindedly.

"So tell me all of it," Tyler says and Jeremy does.

**o o o**

Jeremy tells him everything. About how he figured out that Stefan, Damon, and Vicki were all vampire only after he'd read Elena's diary and discovered he'd been made to forget. He tells about finding out Anna was a vampire and loving her anyway only to have her taken away in front on him. He talks about Alaric, the history teacher, being a vampire hunter who has for some reason decided _not _to hunt vampires, and how his own family is in a long line of hunters. Then he gets into tricky waters, trying his best to explain how and why Caroline was Turned and who exactly did it.

Tyler gives a small jolt when Jeremy mentions Katherine. "I saw her," he blurts out. "She was in my house, with Mason. They were talking about something... I thought it was Elena." He pauses, looking troubled. "Mason knows about all of this?"

Guilt surges up in Jeremy, hot and stifling, at Tyler mentioning Mason is present tense. Like he still exists, still alive. "Yeah," he chokes out. "Yeah he does. It's weird though..."

"Why?"

"Vampires and werewolves, they're supposed to sworn enemies or something. It doesn't really have to be a thing, but in this case it kind of is."

"Why?"

"I don't know," Jeremy says truthfully. "All I know is that moonstone is a big deal. I didn't know when I told you to keep it but... I had a feeling."

Tyler bows his head and sinks his fingers into his hair and tugs. "I... I don't know. I don't..." He looks up. "Well, whatever is up with that stone at least Mason still has it. I gave it to him." The guilt makes Jeremy's eyes burn and he shrugs. "I just wish he'd call. I...I bet he knows everything. If I could just talk to him." In this moment Jeremy knows he can't be the one to tell Tyler about Mason. How can he? How can he even begin... "Do you know anything about that?" Tyler asks and Jeremy's eyes snap away from where they have drifted to his hands in his lap and to Tyler's stressed, dazed expression. "Do you know where Mason could have gone? I keep calling and leaving messages on his phone but it's off."

Jeremy swallows hard and shakes his head. "Nah, I don't know..."

Tyler sighs heavily and looks down again, fingers back in his hair. "I can't believe... all of this is happening in _Mystic Falls_ and no one knows. All those animal attacks were bullshit. People have just been getting _ripped_ apart by _vampires." _He gives a weak, humorless laugh. "And I'm going to turn into a _werewolf_ in a few days and... and Mason..." He fades off and is silent. A few minutes pass and when his hunched shoulders begin to shake a horrified Jeremy realizes that Tyler is crying. He's not making any noise, but his breaths are getting shallow and his fingers are gripping his hair tightly.

Without a second thought, Jeremy moves forward on the bed and reaches out to gather Tyler into his arms. Tyler doesn't stop gripping his hair and at the contact he finally lets out a small, barely there, sound of distress.

Jeremy wants to tell him it will all be fine, that everything will work out, but he can't lie anymore. Especially after backing out on the truth about Mason and letting Tyler think he will ever hear his uncle's voice speaking to him again. The guilt for that literally chokes him and, in the end, all he can do is grip Tyler tighter to him - hold on and squeezing his eyes shut when the trembling voice of his boyfriend, repeating how terrified he is, threatens to break his heart.


End file.
